It's the End of the World as We Know It

The world will end August 2nd.

Or something like that.

Preacher Harold Camping picked 6:00pm May 21st, the Democrats in the Treasury have picked August 2nd.

Thus, the parrots in the activist old media have joined in and said that if we don’t raise the debt ceiling to a bazillion, gazillion dollars by that date the financial markets will collapse, the NFL season will not happen, and unemployment will skyrocket to 8%. Who knows, gas prices might even go up.

“Do you want to have a situation where August 2nd comes and they fail to pass it … and the world laughs at us?” says Chris Matthews. “Does anyone win if we have a catastrophe?”

“I don’t think anyone wins because the catastrophe is so apocalyptic.”

That last quote was NBC’s Andrea Mitchell, not Preacher Camping.

Also, remember Chris, we elected a Citizen of the World as President, why would they ever laugh at us?

Timmy Geithner said not raising the debt ceiling would cause “catastrophic damage.”

The new IMF Chief declared “nasty consequences for the entire global economy.”

Barack Obama says we need to get a deal done to “avert Armageddon.” Hey, I thought Steve Buscemi took care of that in 1998 with Bruce Willis.

And Chicken Little said … well, you know what Chicken Little said.

We’d better hurry up and raise those taxes before we have a housing crisis.

As for the End of the World, we’ve heard this before.

I’m still surprised we survived Y2K. I think we’re living on more than 11 years of borrowed time right now because the end was supposed to come Jan 1, 2000 when my I-pod attacked my lap top because neither knew what day it was.

We’ve been told by the media that killer tomatoes, killer spinach and Mad Cows were all going to do us in. Then it was West Nile, killer bees and Swine Flu.

Now it’s Rapture of August 2nd.

Now, they are talking about the End of the Financial World, but we’ve heard that before too. Pass this bailout, that bailout, this stimulus or that stimulus or Wall St. is a goner and your debit card won’t work to buy a small Slurpee.

Oh, I forgot SARS and Global Warming. Paul Erlich wrote in The Population Bomb that overcrowding would end the world in the 80’s, perhaps sooner.

So here’s the routine, frightened or flat-out evil people try to scare us into doing something so that they can take our cash or convince us to watch the next newscast to see if we’re still alive.

I like my chances that I’ll be back August 3rd to write a follow up column. I’ll bet a small Slurpee on it.

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