The "Teddy Ruxpin" Presidency

Words have meaning.

Somebody said that once—or twice, and the path to a Barack Obama reelection is simple. He just has to change his words.

I know there has been talk from his campaign that he will need to “destroy” his Republican opponent, or even “kill” Mitt Romney, but all they really need to do is change their words. By the way, did they really say kill? Yep, they did. No need to change that word, I guess.

They do need some work on this in the White House and the media has not been afraid to assist. Tweek a few words in the promoter and they’re good to go.

Witness Chris Matthews on the Today show this week talking about the words Obama needs to use if he wants to get reelected.

“Don’t say the word infrastructure one more time, don’t say stimulus one more time, say the bridge, you know, that bridge that you’ve got across Williamsburg, take a look at it, let’s bring that up to shape.”

So “infrastructure” and “stimulus” are now off limits. The words have become bad, not the policies. Just change the words and the nation will return to glory once again. Thank you Chris—keep it up you’ll be put on the payroll. Wait, you work for NBC, and General Electric is already on the payroll.

Obama has so bastardized the language that the words he uses don’t mean what they are supposed to mean, so he just changes them. As if all money belongs to government, he refers to “raising taxes” as “revenue,” and “stimulus” as “investments.” The words “hope” and “change” now mean everything and nothing. The list is long.

Perhaps the left and its activist old media would be happier with the “Teddy Ruxpin Presidency.” Just put the tape (today it would be a hard drive) in the back and have him say the words that would make everybody feel better. “Warm and Cuddly Songs to Dream By” was one of Teddy’s titles in the 80’s, perhaps that could be the Obama campaign theme for 2012.

Teddy was always great with words. Of course, the words were not his—but that didn’t matter, my kids thought he was saying them, and probably thought he was real and even meant them.

I’m figuring it’s time that we give Obama a little help on this front. Time is running out, poll numbers are dying and he simply needs to change the words he uses so we can return to the Shangri-La of the 2008 campaign.

With unemployment at 9.1% (that’s the low number) Obama should start referring to jobs as “rainbows.” “I’m working to find more rainbows.” “I will have a laser like focus on rainbows.” “Republicans are destroying rainbows.” It just sounds so much better that way and this is an absolute winner in 2012. There are other changes that can be made.

Raising taxes should now be called “sunshine.” “All we need is more sunshine.” “Who could possibly be opposed to sunshine?” “Republicans are destroying sunshine.” See, this is easy here.

To follow Chris’ lead here, infrastructure can be called “roses.” “Let’s just plant more roses.” “Take time to smell the roses.” “Republicans are opposed to roses.”

Stimulus can be—-hummmm, what do we call stimulus? Let’s call it “moonbeams.” “I need another 1.5 trillion dollars to give us more moonbeams.” “Moonbeams will rebuild America!” “Republicans have always hated moonbeams.”

Rainbows, sunshine, roses and moonbeams, it’s the perfect plan to rebuild Obama and save America.

The media wants the language changed, so let’s all work together to make this the change we can all believe in. There will be no need for the Obama administration to send out a memo with the new words to be used, they just start using them and the media will gladly follow. Look at how the media now refers to “jobs saved” as some sort of legitimate number. Obama has saved 5 trillion jobs, or whatever the number is—-er, wait—I mean he has “saved rainbows.” There, much better. Saving rainbows.

Add your own ideas here, it’s easy, it’s fun and you could help save America.

The idea to change our language knows no bounds and must be done sooner rather than later. To save Obama they could even start calling tea party members, “terrorists.”

Words have meaning, even Teddy knew that.