Smoking Dopes

Miley Cyrus smoking dope on stage? Who cares?

The best argument against legalizing dope are the celebrity dopes who smoke it.

They think they’re doing something naughty or outrageous. And they make a big deal of it whenever possible.

But anyone can fire up a joint. And they do.

Nearly everyone else does it quietly, and without fanfare–unlike these bozos, who make pot their default prop when they need to feel slightly more important than the marginal twerking twerp they are.

For every celebrity who turns drug use into a “look how bad I am” moment, the less inclined the general population will be toward legalization. Imagine if, during Prohibition, that period’s celebrities made a point of flaunting their drunkenness. We’d probably still be drinking in speakeasies.

So here’s a tip, potheads: act responsibly. Treat your joint like a martini–something your parents did to unwind after work.

That martini said, “you just worked your ass off and you deserve it.” It was a reward for achievement. With pot, the message is different: “Here’s to doing nothing but giggle like a gibbering chimp for another 6 hours.” Until that image changes, marijuana will always be stigmatized by goofy stoners and stupid pop stars.

And I don’t even smoke pot. I’m strictly a paint huffing sort of guy.