Truckee, California. I was there to deal with some family stuff and get away from some family stuff. There I came across the taker and the risk-taker. After being away from this little town outside of Lake Tahoe for at
It’s one thing to complain about something. It’s a better thing to do something about it. David Wain, with his latest film They Came Together, did something beyond dismissing the cliches and lies that construct the typical romantic comedy. He
Publishing baron, billionaire philanthropist, best-selling author, drug addict, intellectual, Bruce Lee fan, internet renegade, rock singer, genius poet, copious wine drinker, whoring titan, and scary but lovable boss Felix Dennis died over the weekend in his home in England after a few
Rock music, at its heart, is the male brain expressing what’s necessary for pleasure. Is that sexist? Of course it is. Rock music is periodically blessed by women, when they join in, but mostly it’s the product of creatures with
Fat White Family suffers from so many self-inflicted flaws they deserve to fail, and disappear. Their name sucks, their sound is erratic, sloppy and self-consciously assholish. Reveling in degradation, glorifying deadly ideologies, stinking of puke and cocaine – they’re a
The week of the tenth anniversary of Ronald Reagan’s death brings me to my only Reagan story–one I’ve told so many times that my fingers are pretty much on auto pilot here, while my brain is thinking about the fried
I first met my mom on September 12th, 1964, in a room at Mills Hospital in San Mateo, California. I have no memory of it, but I can imagine no better person to welcome a fearful little ball of fury
In the interest of time (I’m nearly a half century old and have fewer years ahead than I’ve already swallowed up), I do my best to avoid black holes: what I call “time-suck” stories that are so murky and slippery
I rarely review movies, unless something interesting comes along and then disappears quickly, without fanfare. “Enemy” is one of those forgotten treats. It came out a few months ago, and now, it’s already on ITunes. I suggest you watch it.
1. If an interviewer asks you a question, respond thoughtfully with, “that’s a great question.” Then summarize what the topic is about, concluding with “at the end of the day, it remains to be seen what the impact will be.”
1. Turn it on, and do something else. Do the laundry, clean the apartment, write really bad poetry, watch another show on a competing laptop. The point: if watching the Oscars is the only activity performed while watching the Oscars,
I never get around to seeing movies because I rarely get around to doing anything. This is an important point–as a man with no hobbies and a knack for leaving things unfinished–it’s a big deal for me to finally catch
Last Sunday, the New York Post ran a piece on a book on the real story behind the Kitty Genovese killing–the story of a young woman who was brutally raped and murdered in March 1964 while her neighbors did nothing,
WHAT HE SAYS: I fear that within my belly stirs the emanations of desire for a product that sates the ache within WHAT HE MEANS: I’m hungry WHAT HE SAYS: Well, my darling, being a lowly omnivore like yourself, I
As we mark the ten year anniversary of “nipplegate”–yep, it’s been that long since Justin Timberlake ripped off Janet Jackson’s breastplate during the abysmal halftime show during Super Bowl 38–it pays to ask: was the outrage worth it? The outrage
Everyone has their own Super Bowl, and mine is the conclusion of Downton Abbey, season 4. I watched all the episodes this week, finishing today. Some thoughts: Edith Grantham is the Jan Brady of Downton Abbey. Less attractive and constantly
Here’s a disturbing trend that I have decided to label “attention bias.” This is defined by the desire for your opinion to be observed, and how that desire affects the intensity of your opinion. So, if you happen to like
Maybe, when you were younger and dumber, you had some questionable friends. They dabbled in illegality. They weren’t dependable. They often needed you to bail them out of trouble. They stole stuff…sometimes your stuff. They never paid for gas, and
I hate movie trailers, because whenever I judge a movie based on one, I’m always wrong. The trailer for Greenberg was atrocious – and it was the best movie from 2010. The same thing happens again, with “The Act of
It’s really very simple. Connect something from column A to something from column B. The possibilities are endless! Column A Column B THE CHARACTERS IN HOMELAND EXACERBATES FEELINGS
I didn’t get around to listening to nearly as much crud as I normally do, because all I do these days is work. I do two shows a day and write books at night. I have no leisure time. Nothing.
Last week, Nelson Mandela died. There were more than enough touching eulogies, and any attempt by me would be shoddy, with the depth of a contact lens. Better to sit back, shut up, and think about a lesson to learn
If you have no idea what to buy your wife for Christmas, let me help. A Not Cool Koozie. Yes, a Koozie is EXACTLY what your wife wants for Christmas. Forget the rings, the necklaces, the new IPAD. The Humvee.
Last Sunday, I chose to do nothing. Meaning, I pretended to do something by buying and then consuming bits and chunks of stuff I ordered from my laptop as I sat in my underwear, drinking strong coffee. It’s what I do
This weekend, riddled with sickness, I caught up on the latest series — available on Netflix — written and directed by Ricky Gervais. It’s called Derek, and it’s about a “simple-minded” guy named Derek who works at a retirement home.
I am currently in bed with sniffles, a nasty cough, congestion, sneezing, watery eyes. Does anyone have any suggestions for things to do with kleenex after you’ve used them? Seems like a waste just to throw them away. I was
In case you missed Saturday’s Redeye (and many did, since it wasn’t on the DVR schedule for some ungodly reason), here’s what I think might be the funniest appearance of our Frightened Correspondent – ever. If you don’t pee yourself
Miley Cyrus smoking dope on stage? Who cares? The best argument against legalizing dope are the celebrity dopes who smoke it. They think they’re doing something naughty or outrageous. And they make a big deal of it whenever possible. But
Breitbart News: What do conservatives have to do to resonate with young people? GG: They have to explain, succinctly, why their stuff works. And you have to do it with humor, minus jargon, minus anger. Freedom is fun. It’s not
I can pretty much rattle off perfect albums in my head. These are those special records that after listening, maybe ten or twelve thousand times, you realize there is no way they could have been improved. Meaning, every song means
There were no murders last week in New York City. That, by definition, is amazing. That’s like saying, for one week, there were no pies in Kirstie Alley’s fridge. Or no contagious bacteria in Hef’s grotto. Or no drugs in Andy Dick’s
I was drinking with a buddy of mine – we’re about the same age (closing in on 50) and we started talking about the first thing we ever read. It was the Sunday comics. But mainly, it was Peanuts. Peanuts,
So a Montana man got a five hundred dollar check from the US Treasury after sending them five one-hundred dollar bills that had been eaten by his mutt. He waited for the dog to poop them out, and reassembled the
So, let’s say you realized, that, try as you might, you’re not like the rest of them. You’re different. You don’t instantly agree with them. Their assumptions are no longer yours. Maybe, secretly, they never were. But now, you find yourself the
I have a relative in town, from Russia. She took the subway from the airport to our apartment. A deranged man got on, doing what deranged men do. She said to my wife, “what is he doing in here?” Exactly.
Why do we like gross things? I am not ashamed to say that I like gross things. I don’t like doing gross things. But I like looking at or reading about them. Medical oddities, and stuff like that. And while
I was thinking about the disaster that was the Million Muslim March, and how it might have actually proved its point. Accidentally – of course.It changed its name to the “Million American March Against Fear,” and the only people who showed
Can anyone tell me what happened to the members of Screaming Blue Messiahs? Primarily the singer/guitarist Bill Carter? There is a performer named Bill Carter, but it’s not THAT Bill Carter. I am obsessed with this band and am entirely
Last night on Redeye, we had the great Ariel Pink on the show. If you’re unfamiliar with his work, I’m going to offer you a taste. This song, “Round and Round” is one of my all-time favorites, and it’s from
Dear friends, am now about to review the new F*ck Buttons album, Slow Focus – their third amazing record. Their last one got used in the Britain opening Olympic ceremonies. It was the least offensive part. This record is really,