While President Obama prepares to tell Americans that every dollar of spending by the federal government is vital – or, more realistically, while he prepares to lie about cutting spending while actually jacking it up to record rates – Breitbart News has been looking into possible places worth cutting. Today, we’ll be rolling out a series of such cuts. We suggest cutting these items, rather than raising your taxes.
Last year, the National Science Foundation handed out a grant of $325,000 for the very important scientific purpose of creating a robot squirrel. Seriously. The squirrel, appropriately named “RoboSquirrel,” was designed for a study on how rattlesnakes react to squirrels – a study that will undoubtedly solve America’s unemployment problem, and/or solve cancer. If we’re really lucky, RoboSquirrel may in fact combine forces with Mighty Mouse to save the day.
So while President Obama demagogues about how funding for cancer research must be cut, we suggest that cash be redirected from mechanical furry creatures to that purpose.