In the 80’s my quest was to see the Letterman show live. I LOVED his sense of humor. Memorable segments were “the guy under the stairs,” Larry “Bud” Melman, “Fun with Rupert,” and Biff Henderson’s “Map Across America.” I also got a kick out of Dave’s mom going to and reporting on the Olympics as well as her “name that pie” bit on Thanksgivings. My ultimate fav was Dave’s wacky antics with Mujibar & Sirajul. It was all comic originality; fresh, silly, and sometimes mindless, but really entertaining and funny.
Disappointingly, by the time I finally did see the show in 2004, the bits I loved ceased to exist and most likely had been banished to the “Late Show” archives. Rather than attending my first show with eagerness, it was just a cheap way to kill an evening during a business trip. Since I didn’t have a ticket, I knew I’d need to charm my way in.
A friend had told me that to get in the front row they have “audience scouts” outside the theatre looking for people who are attractive, friendly, expressive, and bubbly. Being an actress I knew how to play that part, so I glammed up and put on my best New York artsy chic and set out to the Ed Sullivan Theatre. The “audience scouts,” who looked all of about 14-years-old, were out in front waiting for their subjects to approach. Oh, to be that young making so little money but holding so much power! Knowing what I must do, I got my “bubble on” and with just the right amount of star stuck enthusiasm I approached one of the 14-year-old keepers of the audience paperwork!
I beamed: “I’ve been trying to get into see Dave’s show since the 80’s when he was on NBC! (Smile, gush, turning my womanly wiles to the young man who showed some flirt) OMG, how do I go about being in the audience? And who’s going to be on the show tonight?” (They don’t reveal who the guests are in advance. My guess is they don’t want to lose audience members once they find out!). The “audience scout” asked me a trivia question “Who is Dave’s assistant?.” I answered “Stephanie” and I was in. He gave me an index card with a specific color sticker on it and told me to come back in two hours and get in “THIS line…not that line…THIS line.” (As if “THIS” line was the waiting list for an organ transplant).
I went back to the apartment, took a nap (feigned excitement is exhausting), and went back at the designated time. Well “THIS” line turned out to be the golden ticket. I was in “the chosen” group to sit in the front row.
Before the “audience wranglers” single filed us into the theatre, they gave a speech in the lobby. First they told us that just before taping Dave comes out and takes questions from the audience. They wanted us to be creative with questions, but no asking for a picture with him or a kiss from him, yadda yadda. Then they told us to “laugh, clap, and cheer loudly and heartily at EVERYTHING Dave says and does. This is how Dave gets fired up. The more clapping and laughing, the better show he’ll have, but no high pitched hooting.” Perhaps Dave might confuse a hoot with a boo.
Wow, the audience holds Dave’s mood in the palm of their clapping hands. This is really shocking to me. Even attractive smiling people sitting in the front row can be anti-Obama. Why would they give the audience that kind of ammo? But I digress. During Dave’s monologue he started Bush bashing. I was a Bush supporter and just starting to become politically active at that time. For me the evening news was simply the boring stuff I had to sit through if I tuned in too early for “Entertainment Tonight” or the “Late Show.” However, I did want to boo at the bashing once the rest of the trained seals stopped cheering, but being alone I didn’t have the courage. I wouldn’t have been comfortable being publicly flogged by the “audience police” that were half my age.
To make my front row “Late Show” experience even worse, Diane Sawyer was the guest! So, I curbed my boos and pouted until the show ended and I was released! (Side note, the “Late Show” band live is amazing!)
Since then, my “Late Show” viewing has been infrequent. I did happen to catch the show mid-March where Dave bashed Bush, Cheney, AND Clinton–an entire trifecta of been there, done that; after which he soberly stated “we finally have someone in the White House we trust.” I waited for the punch line. But holy cow, after a couple beats of dead, uncomfortable air and cricket chirps, he just moved on.
I haven’t watched since. I am NOW done with Letterman. With one exception…I have decided to make it my mission, and to inspire my fellow BHers, to go see the show with the courage I couldn’t find: to “boo” at Dave’s Obama worship and redundant, tired old Bush diatribes. I encourage you to arrive armed with allies; after all, there is safety in numbers.
The left is trying to silence our voices both socially and legislatively. So with the media continuing their embargo against reporting any truths about the administration, the late night comedians ignoring the faux pas,’ blunders, and idiocies of the savior in chief, and Hollywood swooning over their royal hinies, it’s time to use the “Late Show” venue to do one little thing in the name of comedy…boo and hiss instead of staying silent while the lemmings cheer.
Go armed with a couple examples of what makes this president, like every other president, comic fodder, just in case you’re the one Dave picks for the pre-show question and you ask, scratching your head, “Why aren’t you doing any Obama jokes?”
Whether it’s an uncomfortable question pre-show or a “boo/hiss” for some lame bit during the show, it would be fun to rock Dave’s mojo by making joyful noises against Obama the poseur lord. We could take up time and maybe even be ushered out. This would also remind Dave’s writers that there are still Republicans out in his audience!
One thing I know about performers: they can get glowing reviews, standing ovations, and thunderous applause, but they remember the harshest criticism, bad review, or night-long heckle more often than all the positive reviews combined. Tina Fey even mentioned the critical fans on the internet in her acceptance speech for best actress at the Golden Globes. So, let’s start giving Dave a show he’ll remember with an audience that wants real hope for change.
I’m serious, anyone interested in a little “Late Show” guerrilla field trip, send me an email and let’s see how we can make this happen:
lateshow@comcast.net
PS – Let’s not stop at “The Late Show.” In New York City there is also “The Daily Show with Jon Stewart” for your “booing” pleasure (I can hear it from here!), “Colbert Nation” and in Burbank “The Tonight Show” just to name a few. Go forth and exercise your right to “boo” while we still can!
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