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Wikileaks Is All About Sex


So Thursday we talked about those creepy emails Julian Assange sent to a young women, as he tried vainly to get her into the sack. She rejected him, thankfully – but while he was pummeling her with lurid, unwanted missives, he also revealed that he had acquired her license plate and home phone numbers.

And here you have the reason why Assange is a dirtbag – and also the real motivation behind this socalled “transparency” philosophy.

He doesn`t want any information to be secret, because then he can`t get laid.

See, a transparent culture is perfect for a social failure, who is always looking for ways to access your secret info – the stuff that might help a clumsy creep get into your pants.

If you don`t give him your number, don`t worry he`ll find it. The car you drive? He`ll get the license, and ultimately find out where you park it. To him, it`s perfectly normal. Even if he doesn`t assault you, he`ll do his best to invade your private space.

So, in the end, there is nothing romantic, majestic, or journalistic about Assange`s quest for transparency.

It`s all about getting into your emails, and then ultimately your bed.

And if you disagree with me, you probably hate babies and puppies too.


Matt McCall

Imogen Lloyd Webber

Congressman McCotter

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