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Storm's Non-Genderism: Failure Imminent


So let me tell you about Storm, a baby. It seems when Storm was born, his (or her) parents sent out an email. It read:

“We’ve decided not to share Storm’s sex for now – a tribute to freedom and choice in place of limitation, a stand up to what the world could become in Storm’s lifetime (a more progressive place? …).”

Yes, they want to raise a genderless child. No boy toys. No dolls! No surprise.

Kathy Witterick is Storm’s mom – who I’ll call Goofball, since Kathy is so gender specific. Goofball practices “unschooling,” which says a child’s curiosity trumps the learning process.

Forget report cards, tests or books – junior’s intuition should lead to the best decisions.

It did for me: I ate a lot of paste.

And then there’s Goofballs’s hubby, David – who I will call Doreen, because David is so patriarchal.

Doreen teaches at a school that deals with class, race and gender.

Yeah, that’ll get your kid a job!

Talk about a self-perpetuating machine of stupidity. Who needs the three R’s when you only need one, and it’s rage?

Man, your kids are gunna love competing for jobs with Goofball and Doreen’s kids.

A gender studies major? Prepare for a life of temp work.

Now, this couple is weird, for they place the political before the personal. So self-involved, they feel the sacrifices and oddities they burden their families with, are for a greater good.

They live communism to the fullest: i.e. making everyone miserable. They can tell you what’s wrong with America, but never buy any toilet paper.

But hopefully, despite Goofball and Doreen’s selfish idiocy – their children will grow up fine. And then they can wonder: when will their parents finally grow up?

Probably around the time mom and pop need cash.

And if you disagree with me, you’re a racist homophobe.

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