Neil Diamond Working The Phones For Obama

Hey, Babs?

Yeah, Neil?

You Don’t Bring Me Flowers, anymore. Why not?

Why aren’t you out there for Obama?

Holly, Holy! I forgot, Babs.

Listen, Neil, you don’t work for Obama, no flowers, no more albums, no nothing. Nada. Get it?

Yeah, yeah. How’s this?

@NeilDiamond Working the phones for Obama… If I call you, don’t hang up. It’s really me and I need you. ?#OFACulver ?pic.twitter.com/e7oquoid

It’s a start. Get going already, dammit.

Okay. Can Anybody Really Hear Me? (beat) Damn. No one’s out there. This is like the last ten years; The Story of My Life. Well, Play Me, lemme dial again…

Riiiiing.  Riiiiiing.

Damn. Hello? Hello Again? WAIT, DON’T HANG UP!!!

Where is everybody? Damn, this is more embarrassing than riding on that Mount Rushmore Float in the Macy’s parade.

Damn, I feel like a Solitary Man.