Since it turns out only six people actually enrolled in ObamaCare on Day One, maybe there could be one version of the HealthCareDotGov background graphic for each. You never know which of the six you’ll see when you try to log in! Of course, you’ll soon be looking at the 404 error screen, but for a few brief moments, you’ll bask in the radiant visage of one of the half-dozen people Obama managed to sell an insurance policy to, on the day his half-billion-dollar website went “live.”
I know what you’re thinking: we don’t even really know that six people enrolled on Launch Day, because some of those applications could be computer glitches or invalid tumors of crap data. The actual number of authenticated ObamaCare buyers could be zero. No problemo – for those versions of the web page, we can use Agent Smith, or Tron, or another computer-generated virtual reality character. Think of the geek cred Obama would get for putting Tron on his non-functional webpage! And there would be no cost to the taxpayers. Obama’s team ripped off some web code to build their lousy website, so they should have no problem ripping off copyrighted fictional characters.
The sheer absurdity of plucking a few people from the tiny handful of actual ObamaCare buyers, while millions of Americans are suffering through the loss of their insurance policies, might end up hurting the White House enough to offset the political benefit typically conveyed by the use of human props. But Republicans had jolly well better line up their own human props from among those millions, vet the heck out of them – the Left will give anyone who speaks out against Dear Leader and the Peoples’ Glorious Five Year Plan a biographical colonoscopy – and get them on stage pronto.
That’s how our infantile political culture works. Your arguments can be one hundred percent correct, as critics of ObamaCare have been all along… but if you don’t personalize them, and invite America to meet Mary Sue – whose tripled ObamaCare premiums are forcing her to choose between health care and college for her kids, and who is furious at the Democrat Party for insulting her by calling her a “red herring” – you’re not really in the game at all.