Some folks live under lucky stars. You know those people….the ones who seem to always be in the right place at the right time. Then there are those who simply work hard and reap the benefits of their hard work over time. And then there are others…on lookout for a shortcut to a better life.
You know these people too. I mean who doesn’t know a man who’s taken advice from a witch doctor who prescribed letting a hyena eat his genitals off as a way to increase personal wealth? But in case, for some reason, you don’t know somebody like this, it is my distinct pleasure to introduce you to Chamangeni Zulu, who took the advice of a witch doctor who prescribed letting a hyena eat his genitals off as a way to increase his personal wealth.
In his own words:
“I met some business persons [witch doctors] who told me that the best way to become rich was to sacrifice parts of my body.” Zulu said from his hospital bed.
“On 24th March, 2014 around 04:00 hours, I went to a bush where I was instructed to be naked and a hyena came to me and started eating my toes and eventually my manhood was eaten.”
The meal took place in the African bush, after which, Zulu, who is in his early twenties, reportedly crawled to a road where he was picked up by police officers who took him to Chipata General Hospital where he was treated.
Zulu apparently has no regrets regarding the loss of his Johnson, as long he gets what’s coming to him. In this case, a life without sex.
As my old man says, there ain’t no free lunch…unless of course, you’re a hyena.