Turkey Tom Brady Invents Weird Thanksgiving Tradition

Tom Brady lamented the “junk” food handed out on Halloween last month. This month he partook in the time-honored trick-or-treat tradition of scaring small children on Thanksgiving.

The New England Patriots quarterback hid in a leaf pile dressed in a turkey suit to scare two of his children. He made strange sounds that he imagines turkeys make (it’s “gobble, gobble, gobble,” not “whooo, whooo, whooo”) in an effort to frighten his kids, undoubtedly bewildered by their father’s ignorance of Animal Noises 101.

Belichickian in design, Brady’s play relied on the element of surprise. Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition—or a 6’4” 38-year-old disguised as an anthropomorphic meleagris gallopavo.

Christmas arrives in less than a month. Is Tom ready with the Roman candles, barbecue, and American flag bunting?