San Francisco Gate columnist Drew Magary believes that players opting not to receive the coronavirus vaccination are “bad teammates” and “deserve to be booed.”
Calling himself “a dick,” Magary expressed his anger at athletes who are resisting the vaccine by launching into a string of self-censored obscenities.
Saying that vaccines give us freedom — not the U.S. Constitution, apparently — Magary slammed pro sports athletes, writing, “F—k. S—t. Motherf—ker. G-d s—t assholes. Sm*ter—udge. G!bbit. H1$$—job.”
Magary admitted that some have legitimate reasons not to get vaccinated, such as those who are “severely immunocompromised in ways that don’t allow for the shot to work as intended.” In addition, some are ignorant and misinformed, he says. But he doesn’t believe pro athletes fit into any category that excuses them for not getting vaccinated.
But you know who can’t cite any of those reasons? Pro athletes. Like Sam Darnold. And Darnold’s New York Jets replacement Zach Wilson. And Montez Sweat of the Washington Football Team. And Christian McCaffrey. And Kirk Cousins and Harrison Smith and Adam Thielen of the Vikings, the latter of whom missed a game last season after a COVID scare. And a dude on the Mariners who tested positive for the ‘rona last month. Getting COVID in May of 2021 is like buying an Aerosmith album in May of 2021: What’s the point? I haven’t even gotten to LeBron James, who’s out of the playoffs but is still the foremost role model athlete in the country. Trying to figure out if LeBron got the jab is like attempting to translate signals from f—king outer space.
Crowing about how he was vaccinated two months ago, Magary added, “I should not be getting vaccinated before any of these pro athletes have.”
“We’re also talking about people whose livelihoods depend on good health, and who will normally ingest any vial of clear liquid within eyeshot to keep their asses off the injury report,” he exclaimed.
Magary then went into specifics about which players he is talking about.
And yet I have to hear Harrison Smith say, “Just like everybody else, make your own decision.” I have to hear Sweat tell reporters he needs “more facts” before he decides, as if there isn’t already an entire apparatus of team doctors, union reps and government officials who are HAPPY to supply him with the pertinent information and have already done so. Politely. NFL Players Association Executive Director DeMaurice Smith said, “We’ve urged them to just make sure that they just make a decision that’s informed.” Coach Ron Rivera of the Washington Football Team said, “It’s a choice. They’ve got to make a choice.” Everyone has adopted the anti-vaxxer bulls—t lingo of freedom and personal choices to make players like Sweat feel like they aren’t being attacked for not doing their part and getting the needle.
“These athletes SUCK,” Magary railed.
He then insisted that people who oppose the coronavirus vaccine are “stupid” and “dangerous.”
“If you’re anti-vax simply because you don’t believe in it, you are wrong and stupid and dangerous. You don’t want more information. You don’t want facts. You hate facts. You hate other people and prefer to express that hatred through a form of belligerent apathy,” he wrote.
And you MAGA fans? Well, you are “dickheads,” Magary blurted out.
“And none of us ACTUALLY respects your decision. We hold it in complete and utter contempt… It’s one thing for some random MAGA dickhead to be among these stragglers. It’s a whole other thing for a high-profile athlete like Darnold to not only shun the vaccine but to publicly cast doubt upon its already proven efficacy. YOU ASSHOLES ARE SLOWING EVERYTHING DOWN,” Magary screamed.
From there, Magary unleashed another string of invective at players who won’t get vaccinated:
The remaining unvaccinated athletes are all lost causes, and they deserve to be booed for it. Shamed. Ridiculed. They’re scum. They’re cops. They’re also bad teammates, given that one bad test or contact tracing fiasco could put them out of commission for weeks at a time and cost their team precious victories. And for what? NOTHING.
In the end, Magary had a recommendation for how to treat these players:
So boo them. Call them names. Get personal from the bleachers. Hold up a giant copy of your vaccination card to taunt them with. Let them understand that there are earned consequences for being so negligent. For endangering everyone around you and then having the naked gall to act like it’s some sacred private decision you just made.
Magary ended his screed with an invitation for critics: “Well, here’s a private decision I just made: I invite you to kiss my naked, disease-free ass. ”
Follow Warner Todd Huston on Facebook at: facebook.com/Warner.Todd.Huston.
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