GOV2.0: Defining the Mandate

A good looking, fun loving guy sits down and writes a few blog posts about how to ensure the Republican Party wins both houses in a 2010 landslide, and beat Obama’s ass in 2012… he figures his job is done.

Sure, York at the Examiner will pick it up… but apparently, on this Internet thing, you might have to say things twice to actually get a Minority Leader to read the script. Something about, “going virus.” So uncover your mouths, I’m going to sneeze.

There is no reason to get trapped in a vote-losing song and dance about, “What will Republicans cut,” when asked for specifics on Sunday Morning shows. (Side Note: Amanpour curdles the soul. George Will sitting next to her during this toxic experiment will be doing god’s work.)

Ok, you are covered in pancake makeup sitting under a 500W Grow Light, and then sure enough, here it comes: “What will you cut?”

Throw back your head, laugh maniacally, and cackle, “Public Employees!”

Er, no, instead say, “We certainly are not going to cut any public services; for the amount of money they pay, the taxpayers shouldn’t have to give up a single damn thing. But when Republicans take over Congress, we’re going to run government like a business. And the way we see it, the shareholders are the voters, elected officials are the management, and the Public Employees are overpaid.

When Republicans take over Congress (yes, repeat this phrase) – we will view it as a mandate to to improve Government Productivity by 5% each year for the next 5 years. Productivity Gains will be found in headcount reductions and privatization with transparent online competitive bidding from local small businessmen to provide many state and local services. Under a Republican Congress, state and local governments that do not make 5% productivity gains year over year, will not be eligible for discretionary Federal funds. Read my lips: Public servants will either adapt or be fired. This doesn’t mean all Public Employees take pay cuts; it means some of them do, and some are outsourced.”

My god, the whole country understands that Government hasn’t undergone the forces of brutal efficiency like their jobs have. There hasn’t been ANY verifiable improvement in Government Productivity since the early 90’s.

Here is some very basic math that assumes for the next five years we will have five percent (5%) productivity gains in Local, State, and National Government. I’m using 2009 as the baseline. 2011 numbers will look even better.

It isn’t complicated, read the script. Follow it. You’ll be speaker for the next 20 years.