Rock Rebel Embraces 'The Man': Sting Wants Bigger Government (For Us)

Former Police frontman Gordon “Sting” Sumner has once again made news – this time with his insistence that “the people” are clamoring for big government (read: a socialist nanny state):

“Well, you can see the enthusiasm out there. And people are here to really tell big government that we want big government to make big decisions about the most important problems we face. And also to pressure our corporations to behave properly, as consumers, but we’re here to — we’re asking for big government, basically.”

Sting

First of all, who is this “we?” Don’t include me in that statement, bucko – or the readers of Big Hollywood, for that matter. And don’t include the millions of Tea Party attendees all across this still great nation of ours. Obviously someone’s too busy polishing the Grammys on his mantel to pay much attention to the news – except to watch videos of his own CNN appearances, natch.

And I have to ask the obvious question – is Mr. Sumner even an American citizen, or is he just here because the US (for now) taxes him at a lower rate than the UK? Either way, he’s a blowhard who doesn’t speak for me.

Musicians/actors/entertainers/celebrities like Gordy live in a privileged bubble surrounded by brown-nosed yes men, with the funds available to hire accountants to help them find every single little tax loophole so that less money leaves their bank accounts to fill government coffers as possible. How else could he afford five lavish homes in glamorous locales all over the world? How else could his wife afford private charter flights to the White House Correspondents’ dinner?

I find it ironic that the rock and roll culture has morphed from the “don’t trust anyone over 30” mantra of the 1960s to the “we’re not gonna take it anymore” Twisted Sister motto of the 1980s to the “smells like teen spirit” posturing of the 1990s to the slavering “we’re asking for big government” kowtowing of today.

But then, I suppose an independent streak doesn’t get one invited to visit the Community Organizer in Chief so that later, one can gush about The One’s being “very genuine, very present, clearly super-smart, and exactly what we need in the world.”

The whole thing puts me in mind of an old Calvin and Hobbes strip, where Calvin says:

“The problem with rock ‘n’ roll is that the generation that created it is now the establishment. Rock pretends it’s still rebellious with its video posturing, but who believes it? The stars are 45-year-old zillionaires or they endorse soft drinks! The ‘revolution’ is a capitalist industry! Give me a break!”

I’d add that they’re not just a part of the capitalist industry they profess to despise, but they’re also now supporters of an overly-intrusive government they once wanted to overthrow, or at least gave that impression in order to sell records to become part of the capitalist industry…

Oy, the boomerang effect is giving me a headache.

STING_LRG

Now, if Gordy really is a fan of big government, then I’d like to pass on a suggestion made by Hugh Hewitt, which was passed on to me by John Nolte: let the government run the music business. Can you imagine? Caps on prices for CDs and music downloads, because inexpensive entertainment is a right. No more expensive concert tickets either. It’s outrageous that people should have to pay so much for a couple of hours of warbling! In fact, government should regulate where these concerts are held because because it’s not fair for some patrons to get up close and personal in the front row while others are relegated to the nosebleed section.

It’s also not fair that Gordy and his band get to luxuriate before a show while enjoying chilled Evian water, full-bodied French wines, good quality vodka, champagne, fresh fruit and fruit juices, French cheeses and six – not five or seven – but six yogurt drinks. What does all of that imported food do for our carbon footprint? Much better to have that regulated as well so that while on tour, Gordy can enjoy cheese curds in Wisconsin, ham hocks in Alabama and coffee milk in Rhode Island. You know, eat locally and all that. And NO plastic bags or containers. I’ve heard plastic is bad. They should eat off of “sustainably harvested” bark plates and drink out of their cupped hands.

Heck, while we’re at it, why not let the government force musicians and other entertainers to perform free of charge for the masses? Shouldn’t they be obligated to share their talent, rather than profit from it? Isn’t that the “big government” way? “From each according to his ability; to each according to his needs.” I needs me some free music, because heaven knows I’m not as talented as Gordon Sumner. And a free iPod. Someone get Apple on the horn.

I’d say that’s a really big problem we’re facing, to quote Gordy. Forget illegal aliens, forget Iran getting ready to blow us up as soon as possible, forget the economic collapse in Europe that’s on its way over here as we speak. Nope, free music for all is a winning campaign slogan for some enterprising politician out there.

Believe me, they need all the help they can get these days.

Seriously: I’m all for making money any way you can (legally, of course), and I don’t begrudge Gordy his multimillion dollar bank account. He earned it. However, in exchange, I’d appreciate him keeping his big nose out of my business. If he wants to admit to being for “big government,” fine and dandy. But please, don’t presume to speak for the rest of us.

And don’t be surprised when we’re not to keen to jump on your poseur bandwagon.

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