When John Nolte asked me to write a piece for Big Hollywood on the affect of popular culture on feminism, I got nervous. Surely he remembers that I don’t agree with the majority of his readership’s politics? But then I remembered that this is precisely why we had become friends. In general it seems that the Republicans I’ve met in Hollywood are much more willing to reach across the aisle than some liberals, whom I sadly have to admit can be quite elitist. But that’s another piece for another time.
Still, what I have to say about feminism and popular culture will probably shock conservative, right-wingish folks. (I can literally see the angry comments now — heck I could practically write them myself). But in the name of tolerance, keep in mind that I was born and raised in Europe, Germany for the most part. We don’t have the same relationship with sex and sexual content Americans have. I grew up seeing boobies and penises on television shows (even commercials) and in magazines; none of them X-rated and none of them were ever attacked by what we call “clean content organizations.”
As a result, I don’t instantly associate nudity with sex the way many Americans do. When Janet Jackson’s wardrobe malfunction became this country’s most talked about crisis, I thought we were being punked…until I realized that people were seriously offended. And that’s their right… but really?
Furthermore, when I came of age and my mother realized I liked boys and they liked me back, I got “the talk.” But I am very certain that the talk I got was nothing like the talk most American kids get. I’ll spare you the details, but let’s just say my mother was less concerned about me having sex than explaining all options of birth control to me in detail, before she gave me a long speech about the difference between a kind and considerate lover and a wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am kind of guy.
I will be forever grateful for her wisdom, and her courage to accept the fact that a teenager’s hormones will almost always win against the voice of reason, no matter how hard you try to hammer it into your kid.
Now, having said all that, despite my “progressive” European upbringing, I have a huge problem with the society girls, reality stars and partying starlets mentioned in the MacLean’s article that inspired this series. Obviously, no matter what your politics or beliefs are, these women don’t inspire pride in your gender, quite the contrary.
But I’m less offended by their sluttiness and blatant sexuality; I’m offended because they are just straight out dumb. My first thought always goes to their parents. Where are they? What are they saying to these girls? Didn’t they teach their daughters that life is about leaving a legacy? Because right now their legacy is an embarrassment, a joke, a shame. In medieval days they would have been referred to as court buffoons.
My next thought goes to the people who watch this trash. Because isn’t that what it’s really about? None of these networks would green-light shows about humane train wrecks and none of the gossip magazines would put them on the cover, if there wasn’t an AUDIENCE!
I was once introduced to a reality show producer and being one never to miss an opportunity, right after he revealed that he was a fan of my work I casually mentioned my reality show idea. Having no other choice, he asked me what it was:
Me: “The show is called NOT THE HILLS and it’s about five strong, intelligent and independent girls who share a house as they compete for an all-financed spot in an Ivy League college. While they are all amazing girls, they would come from totally different backgrounds and beliefs, which results in a lot of tension as they decide when to stand their ground and when to admit that another opinion might have trumped their own. Picture a young Ellen DeGeneres, joined by a young Sarah Palin, a young Oprah, etc.”
Producer: “People want to see teens in relationships–“
Me: “They can date. As a matter of fact they do date, just like any normal girls that age, they just do it with integrity.”
Producer: “There are no numbers in integrity.”
And that was that. I never mentioned the show again. Sure he was a scumbag, but the scumbag was right, wasn’t he? How many of you watch The Bachelorette rather than an intelligent episode of Masterpiece Theater on PBS? Be honest.
The few American ladies I know who were around during the golden age of feminism have shared with me that it was also a time of sexual revolution and evolution. Women realized they didn’t need to marry and have sex as if it was one of their housewife chores. Instead, they started to enjoy sex and many opted for lovers over husbands. So, I’m confused on how today’s sexuality interferes with feminism.
I think ignorance and stupidity does affect feminism … badly, but I think a hot woman should be able to wear a mini skirt without having her professionalism or accomplishments questioned. If I had the legs, I’d wear one every day.
One woman who has positively contributed to feminism and equality is Angelina Jolie. Think of her what you want, but the fact that she accepted the lead role in a film (“Salt”) that was written for a male star (Tom Cruise was attached at one time), was — trust me — a major, major milestone in this business. Not only did she flawlessly deliver the same amount of action a man would, resting on her shoulders alone, the film was a box-office success.
The bottom line is: sexuality is not the force destroying feminism — stupidity and ignorance is. Let’s raise smart and sophisticated girls who, when given a choice, pick up a book rather than watch trashy television.
So to all those mothers who blame Paris, Snooki, Lindsay and co., I suggest you stop whining and take responsibility. Firstly, it’s the right thing to do and secondly, it would set a great example for your daughter.
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