Morrissey: Straight Men to Blame for War

Morrissey: Straight Men to Blame for War

British singer Morrissey may have figured this whole “war” thing out.

The singer, known both for his work with The Smiths and his solo recordings, says straight men’s zest for killing leads to a planet teeming with conflict.

“War, I thought, was the most negative aspect of male heterosexuality. If more men were homosexual, there would be no wars, because homosexual men would never kill other men, whereas heterosexual men love killing other men. They even get medals for it. Women don’t go to war to kill other women. Wars and armies and nuclear weapons are essentially heterosexual hobbies.”

Tell that to Jeffrey Dahmer’s victims.

Morrissey, an avowed vegetarian, is also making news this week for turning down an appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live because he would be forced to share a stage with some of the stars of TV’s Duck Dynasty reality show.

“As far as my reputation is concerned, I can’t take the risk of being on a show alongside people who, in effect, amount to animal serial killers,” the singer said in a statement posted online.