Shock New U.S. Study: Dope Smokers Smoke Dope, Like Basketball and Listen to Rap Music

Shock New U.S. Study: Dope Smokers Smoke Dope, Like Basketball and Listen to Rap Music

Twitter accounts dedicated to marijuana use are more likely than not to extol the smoking of weed, celebrate its terminology and paraphernalia, recommend the advantages of having sex while high, praise the calming and/or restorative effects of a nice fat blunt – and are also especially popular with potheads in the 17 to 19 demographic, musicians and basketball fans, a study from the Washington University School of Medicine in St Louis, MO, has found.

The startlingly insightful study – funded, of course, by the US taxpayer via the National Center for Research Resources – analysed six months’ of tweets from the popular Twitter handle @stillblazingtho (aka Weed Tweets) which has over one million followers.

Here are some of its findings.

58 per cent of its Tweets appeared to be jokey/humorous

“Happy Hump Day. Get high and hump someone” and “Facebook makes me hate people I actually know. Twitter makes me want to smoke blunts with people I’ve never met.”

18 per cent suggested that marijuana makes you feel good.

“Stress can pull you down but weed can lift you right back up” “A little herb can calm a lot of nerve.”

15 per cent advocated frequent usage

“I need a joint. Or two. Or three” “Weed is my morning cup of coffee”

10 per cent concerned paraphernalia/techniques/terminology

 “If at first you don’t succeed roll a blunt and smoke some weed.” “How to make weed brownies” [with link]

10 per cent concerned “risky behaviors”

 “Drugs tear friends apart. Weed brings them closer.” “The best thing about getting high and having sex is getting high and having sex.”

8 per cent featured motivational or inspiring messages

“Herb is the unification of mankind – Bob Marley”

Among the study’s other shock findings were that Weed Tweets’ largest demographic were African Americans (42 per cent); that its followers had an income level below the Twitter median; that their main interests were music and basketball; and that their favourite musicians were Wiz Khalifa, Drake, Lil Wayne, Mac Miller, Nicky Minaj, Rihanna and Eminem.

According to unconfirmed rumours, the authors of the study are now considering two projects in a similar vein. The first will examine the Twitter feed of @pontifex in search of evidence that the account holder may be Catholic and based in Vatican City.

The second will study @ursinedefecation in the hope that this may cast new light on bears’ outdoor toilet habits in arboreal environments.