LEITH, United Kingdom – When Caroline McMaster from Leith noticed her ‘Vote Yes’ posters being attacked every night she rightly suspected that slimy no campaigners may have been involved. But she admits she had not realised how right her theory was until she got up early this morning to find the latest one being eaten… by snails.
For weeks McMaster had replaced the ‘Yes’ poster on the front door of her house on Hermitage Park Grove, only to find it damaged in the morning. She was sure her neighbours were to blame, but had not suspected the neighbours would be of the no-legged variety.
This morning she got up early and discovered next doors cat had caught the vandals red tentacle’d!
Mrs McMaster told Breitbart London: “The snails were the earliest voters out this morning, at 6.30am. When I opened my door I saw the cat looking at them, he knew what was going on.
“I’m pretty certain the cat would have had them for breakfast but I decided to let them off with their crime. So I took them off my door and put them in a safe place in the garden. For days I’ve been angry with the slimy sod that was wrecking my posters, it was only today I realised just how slimy they turned out to be.”
The actions of the snails did not intimidate McMaster from getting down to the polling station early this morning. When we met her she was celebrating her yes vote with a can of Tennent’s.