We all know that Kim Jong-il is “buy-yourself-a-handgun” crazy. It’s pretty much a given. That begs the question however: why is anybody (particularly our president) even considering trying to tiptoe around this shady, marionette-looking character? Am I the only one who feels that something serious needs to be done here?



Any man who’s ever spent time in a schoolyard understands exactly what North Korea is trying to pull. They’re shoving us. They are flicking the jab outside by the monkey bars trying to see what we’re made of. It’s the age-old “alpha male” ritual that every man has come to experience at some point in his life. The peculiar thing is that North Korea isn’t even big or strong enough to be the schoolyard bully. North Korea is really just the kid who decided he’d be “all out crazy” hoping people would be scared off by the tirades and avoid stepping up to the plate. The sad thing is it’s been working. Even sadder is that without the proper action, North Korea just might end up being “that kid” who shoots up the school.

With the U.N doing nothing more than disapproving of North Korea’s recent monkey business, and the United States no longer giving the council their OWN teeth, it looks as though the “adult supervision” has completely left the schoolyard. It’s turned into a proverbial “Lord of the Flies” situation out there… And we’re not even holding the conch.

For crying out loud, the U.N. condemned the missile launches, demanded an apology, and then North Korea demanded the U.N. apologize for demanding an apology… No, this isn’t an Abbot and Costello routine, and there is no punchline. This is actually happening. How anybody could take the U.N. even remotely seriously after this one, I’ll never understand.

Right now, it’s time for somebody to step up to this tiny, nutty little tyrant and shove him back. Better yet, why doesn’t the United States reprise it’s role as the “global parent” and take charge of the situation altogether. I remember the days when we had a president willing to do just that. Apparently though, having the cojones to do the right thing isn’t worth the harm it does to the United States’ international relationships. We’re supposed to appease dictators, not hurt their feelings, remember?

Folks, the time has come and gone for pointing the finger and threatening a “time out.” I say that the hour has come to start hand-delivering a good old-fashioned spanking. Who’s with me?

Oh, and since we’re doling them out… Tack Sean Penn onto the list.