I’m not sure why I bothered to sign up for MySpace. My manager assured me that it would be good for my career, but that was a long time ago, way back when it was okay to call the President a liar. I signed up too late, because MySpace just isn’t cool anymore. The idea behind my page was to introduce a new generation to my stand-up comedy, and help me develop a fan base. Instead it’s making people think I’m a sexual predator.

I get friend requests all the time now, from shirtless teenage boys who are into skateboarding, and old dudes, and I can tell right away, that it’s a cop. (I’m beginning to think there isn’t anybody really on MySpace anymore, just pedpophiles and cops.) Every police force in America has at least one or two full-time officers pretending to be teenagers, and trolling through MySpace at all hours of the day. They’re looking for depraved lonely men, longing to do something despicable, and arranging meet-ups at the mall. The next thing you know, they’re starring on “NBC Dateline: To Catch A Predator.”

Over the four years the NBC series was on the air “To Catch a Predator” host Chris Hansen made a lucrative career out of setting up old men with fictional teenagers. He also got a lot of those men arrested. Apparently, intent to contribute to the delinquency of a fictional teenager is a crime in many jurisdictions.

The show was cancelled in December 2008. I’m guessing the producers were finding it hard to trap perverts anymore. With so many cops on MySpace, and the teenagers moved on to other social networking sites, I would guess they were starting to get cops hooking up accidentally. I was always hoping to catch the episode where two cops at the mall suddenly realize they had spent the last month online, having cyber-sex with each other.

Yet, MSNBC, home of Keith Olbermann, cannot get enough of the Predator series. A popular feature there is “Predator Raw: The Unseen Tapes.” This is a collection of previously recorded stings from the series, which never aired during its network run. In fact, on September 21, 2009 MSNBC will run another episode of the show.

Which leads me around to my point: If soliciting a fictional teenager for sex is a violation of the law, then CERTAINLY, aiding and abetting the importation of fictional teenagers into a US sex ring, is a crime at least as heinous.

So where is MSNBC on the ACORN scandal? Where is Chris Hansen? Where is Olbermann? Certainly “Predator Raw” viewers would be just as shocked and entertained watching ACORN employees being cuffed and led away, as they are watching fat old pedophiles. And if the ultimate reason behind the NBC series was to protect youth, certainly protecting the youth of El Salvador, kids who might have been kidnapped and brought into this country as slaves, is a mission equally noble.

Keith Olbermann has a very devoted fan base. People who watch him religiously, watch him exclusively. They also consider themselves well informed, despite only getting the news that Keith is willing to report. So why is he keeping them in the dark?

Come on Keith, you can’t hide it from them forever.