Olbermann: Just Another Cash-Hungry Capitalist by Greg Gutfeld 25 Jan 2011 post a comment Share This: So just like me, MSNBC had an irritating organ removed from its lower midsection. Yes, Keith Olbermann is gone. So people are obviously wondering - who's going to replace Olby? My suggestion: the great Brian Dunkleman. He is an American treasure. Now, there's much conjecture behind Keith's exit. Some say it's ideology - that Comcast wanted to rid MSNBC of it's left-leaning furniture. If that's true, then they only lost a tattered end of a sectional. But others say it's cash - since Olby is the kind of guy whose salary will never be enough - if there's someone else making more. It's the old, "I only walk taller if my neighbor is limping" sort of thing. Anyway, it's odd for a progressive to be so enamored by competition. And cash. I suppose as long as your motives are Chomsky-approved, you're an exception to your own rules. Things like basic politeness don't apply - as long as you only care about my money. I call this the Sean Penn rule, named after my buddy Sean who went to Penn state. He was a jerk. Anyway, it's a glorious hypocrisy: that a man so disgusted by America's me-first attitude turns out to be nothing more than a consumption addict, gobbling dollars like the ruthless corporate machine he so publicly loathes. Never mind crud like global warming or social justice - what really moves Olby "forward" is the Benjamins. I can't blame him. I love Mr. Bratt. But you know that if you were in his place, doing what he does - he'd call you the worst person in the world. And be mad that he's only making a few million for it. ...and if you disagree with me, you're slightly worse than Hitler.