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Lonewolf Diaries: Marriage Is for Suckers and Ugly Folk


If you’ve been taking notes from such brilliant minds as Bill Maher, Cameron Diaz or ever taken a moment to observe Hollywood in the past few decades, you’d know that marriage is a dead institution. I mean, who gets married anymore (unless you’re gay)?! It’s like, “Hellooooooooooo”!

I happened to catch Cameron “My Career is Over Thanks to HD” Diaz discussing the intricacies of marriage on “Real Time with Bill Maher” this week. A lot of tinseltown jibber jabber ensued but you needn’t be bored with the self-indulgent details. Cameron basically proclaimed that she’s glad that she’d never gotten married because she “definitely would have been divorced (multiple times).” She just needed to do what was right for her and that that was constantly changing. Maher, of course, agreed and praised Cameron in her wisdom for having learned to put herself first and foremost, before all others in her life. Marriage can’t work because you have to look out for “Numero Uno”… That’s the Hollywood way!

Besides, haven’t you listened to all of the celebrity preachings? Marriage is nothing but a silly piece of paper… And you don’t need that to prove your love. Also, affairs and coke-bender-induced hooker orgies are cool and allowed… I think that’s in the fine print of a “legal union.”

Diaz then went on to say, “Anyone will tell you that like, when I’m in a relationship I’m committed like… a thousand percent!”

Firstly, don’t judge her mathematical shortcomings too harshly, as it’s beside the point. The real kicker here is that much like all of Hollywood, Cameron Diaz has no idea as to what commitment really means. What good is commitment to a relationship if it’s only temporary?

The problem is that the people of Hollywood are so wrapped up in themselves that they’ve confused their movies with real life relationships. In real life, your short-term commitment is of no good. Because unlike in the motion pictures, when the montage of naked horseback riding and fornication under the waterfall ends… The story is far from over.

The relationship will go on to be tested through ups, downs, loop-dee-loops and unexpected hardships. Once that “feeling” of initial passion is gone, you’re left with each other, your relationship, and the moral fortitude on which it was built. No longer is it the director’s (or cameraman’s or lighting guy’s) job to keep the spark alive, it’s yours and your spouse’s alone.

I wouldn’t expect the “immediate gratification” crowd of Hollywood to understand the true concept of love, however, as that would actually require them to look outside of themselves for a change. Esteeming others first… What a concept!

Am I off-base in my point of view? Do you ladies (or guys) out there feel that the “growing and cultivating” view of love is completely void of romance and has no place in the talkies? How about the real world?

All I’m saying is that I rarely find myself pointing to Sean Penn’s love life thinking, “I want to be like that.”

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