Moby Spins Like Top to Defend Obama's Awful Jobs Record

President Obama forces his disciples to spin like a Ferris Wheel just to explain away his awful job performance.

Moby, the electronic musician-vegan-animal rights activist-economic guru whose career peaked roughly ten years ago, has weighed in on the new jobs report.

With his unique blend of sophisticated intelligence and silver-tongued verbiage, Moby Tweeted:

“in 2008 the u.s was losing 250,000 jobs a month. in 2012 the u.s is adding 100,000 jobs a month. how, pray tell, is that not an improvement?

So, angry, delusional, and unmedicated republicans, where was your outrage when bush was president and u.s was losing 500k jobs a month? Hm?

i mean, simply: isn’t adding 100k jobs a month better than losing 500k jobs amonth, as was the case at the end of bush presidency?

rationally debating with republicans is like trying to teach a pig to sing. you wasteyour time and end up irritating the pig.”

What the intellectually challenged musician is too dumb to note is that we are not in a recession; we are supposedly in an economic recovery. There are so many people dropping out of the labor force (the labor participation rate is at a 31 year low) that if one used the labor participation rate from January 2009, unemployment would be close to 12 percent. Average wages actually declined in August.

And here’s something else for Moby to chew on: According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, back in January 2009 when Barack Obama was sworn in, there were 2.6 million people unemployed for more than 6 months. By June 2012, the ranks of the long-term jobless soared more than 100 percent to 5.3 million.

But Moby definitely subscribes to an alternate view of reality; just refer back to 2006:

“Dance star MOBY has no time for overly-heterosexual males, insisting gay men are far superior to their straight counterparts. The heterosexual music-makeris so appalled by macho male culture he hopes his future children will be gay because ‘they are less likely to get into a fight and less likely to date rape people.’

The PLAY hitmaker says, ‘I’m straight but I’ve grown up around gay people and gay clubs. They are superior to straight people. If you have a gay child you’re more inclined to be a prouder parent.'”

Okay, so he’s from an alternate universe. Maybe in that galaxy economic recovery means something a little different.