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William Shakespeare Responds to the CBC Declaration of War Against The Tea Party


During the past few weeks we have been covering the cross-country trip of Members of the Congressional Black Caucus (CBC) who have been been using job fairs as an excuse to incite hatred against the grass roots Tea Party movement. Among the more famous incidents were Maxine Waters telling the Tea Party to go to hell, Frederica Wilson declaring the Tea Party as the enemy, and CBC Whip Andre’ Carson’s statement that the Tea Party programs are the efforts of Jim Crow who would like to see Black American’s “hanging from a tree.”

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These charges are very serious and very false. Rather than try to address these CBC charges myself, I have decided to ask someone much more talented in the language arts to answer the Congressional Black Caucus. I’ve channeled the Bard himself, William Shakespeare to answer the CBC’s reprehensible, divisive rhetoric. This morning I went to a medium-rare and spoke to the spirit of the Bard of Avon, below is what he told me to write:

To call me names if it will feed nothing else,

it will feed my resolve. The CBC hath disgraced me, and

hindered me with their mistruths; laughed at my losses,

mocked at my policy, scorned my constitution, thwarted my

honest dialogue, cooled my supporters, heated mine

enemies; and what’s his reason? I am a tea party patriot.

Hath not a patriot eyes? hath not a patriot hands, organs,

dimensions, senses, affections, passions? fed with

the same food, hurt with the same weapons, subject

to the same diseases, healed by the same means,

warmed and cooled by the same winter and summer, as

a CBC Democrat is?

If you prick us, do we not bleed?

if you tickle us, do we not laugh? if you poison

us, do we not die? and if you wrong us, shall we not

expose you for what you are? If we are like you in the rest,

we will resemble you in that.

If a tea party patriot wrong a Democrat,

what is his humility? Lies.

If a Democrat

wrong a tea party patriot,

what should his sufferance be by

the Democratic example?

Why, TRUTH. The villainy you teach us,

we will execute the opposite, and will expose you

for what you are, frauds

who bully American voters like us lest we remind the public

you have no entitlement to your position

Nay we hold the power and you sit at our whim and will

Remember November, the Second of November remember:

Did not the Tea Party wave rise for the budget’s sake?

What progressive was sent home, that did lose,

And not for the economy? What, shall one of us

That struck the biggest progressive congress in all of history,

But for Taxing and Spending, shall we now

Contaminate our cause with base rhetoric,

And sell the mighty space of our constitutional movement

For so much trash talk as may be grasped thus?

I had rather be a dog, and bay the moon,

Than such a
n American

You have done that you should be sorry for.

There is no terror, CBC, in your charges

For we are armed so strong in honesty

That they pass by me as the idle wind,

Which I respect not.

We did ask of you

Not to spend sums of gold, which you denied us,

For we will raise no more money till the budget cut.

By heaven, I had rather coin my heart

And drop my blood for drachmas than to wring

From the hard hands of any American their limited cash

To pay for your fiduciary indiscretion.

We did sent

To you to pay our bills FIRST,

Which you denied us and called us racist.

Was that done like Americans? Should we have answered

the Congressional Black Caucus so?

When Tea Party Patriots grow so covetous of power

To use such rascal venom in political debate

Be ready, gods, with all your thunderbolts.

Dash them to pieces!

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