Gays can now serve openly in the military, but what the heck does that actually mean? Can they serve as Grand Marshal in the Gay Pride parade, and will there be one of those on base? Will we see a bunch of guys in boots, berets and not much else on floats? Who showers with who, who bunks with who, who’s zoomin’ who? Pardon me if I think the howls about human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together and mass hysteria are a little over blown. Will there be problems? Of course. Will the military make rules to deal with those problems and enforce them? Of course. Let’s look at a few flash points.
The showers, woah they are gonna let gays in the showers! This is the one that falls apart immediately. There are already gays in the showers and you’ll pardon me if I failed to note the epidemic of gayness-related problems with that. Seriously fellas, turn around in the shower and look, there is probably a gay guy behind you. And yet somehow he has managed to avoid touching your junk. Good gravy, you are in much more jeopardy flying home for Xmas and getting molested by the TSA, than you are in a military shower. Changing the rule about whether the people already in the shower can admit they are gay isn’t going to result in them deciding “Well that means it’s time for a literal game of grab ass”. If they had the self control to ignore you before, nothing will change. And if someone doesn’t, the UCMJ has an answer for that.
The question about whether gays will get housing and benefits for their partners seems already to be a no, and that is the right answer for that. Another concern is whether those who find themselves unable to serve with open gays will be allowed to ask for a discharge. Initial reports say no, but that would be wrong and a mistake. We let gays and a bunch of folks who just didn’t like the military to be discharged so if we change the rules, then those affected should have the option to leave. I don’t think that will be a particularly large a number, but we shall see. Another concern is chaplains who believe homosexuality is a sin having to minister to gay troops. My understanding was “Love the sinner, hate the sin”. We already have many flavors of chaplains and religions and I’m sure we can work out a way to deal with religious gays.
This will not be a quick or painless transition, but early signs are that it will be done in the way least likely to affect readiness, and at a pace approved by our military and civilian leadership in agreement. The military will be fine, next slide.
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