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Maher: Trump And Carson Show Elections Need To Be Longer Because ‘Americans Are Dumb’

HBO’s “Real Time” host Bill Maher argued that the success of GOP presidential candidates Donald Trump and Dr. Ben Carson proves “Americans are dumb” and need to have longer elections.

Maher said, “if you’re following the presidential race, you know that 2015 has been the year of the amateur. If there’s one thing Republican voters can agree on it’s that the less the head of our government knows about government, the better. John Kasich is one of the few adults in the field, and he’s trying to buck this trend with this catchy slogan, ‘Kasich, I know how a bill becomes a law.’ But that’s not what GOP voters want anymore. Experience? Ugh. Knowing things? Republicans avoid that stuff like a gay son. And that explains their two leading candidates, Captain Carnival Barker and Sleepy McCrazypants. Like many of you, I’ve spent the past few months thinking you can either want Trump to be leader of the free world, or I can take you seriously, but it can’t be both.”

He continued, “Ben Carson, who says that the Ayatollah Khomeini and Vladimir Putin went to college together, which no one can even find a source for, except perhaps Ambien. He’s now the front runner? Of course he is, because 85% of Iowa Republicans say they find the total lack of government experience to be his biggest selling point. But if their kid needed brain surgery would they say, ‘Forget Ben Carson, he’s a brain surgery insider?’ Where else in life does anyone ever apply this thinking? When their toilet is broken do they say, ‘Get me anybody but a plumber. The sh*t’s about to back up in here. What we need is an outsider.’ So, it’s this kind of thinking, or the lack of it, that has inspired me to change my view on an important aspect of American elections. I used to say that our elections went on far too long, but you know what, no. Americans are dumb. They need extra time.”

Maher concluded, “We’re not the French. We’re not the British. We’re Americans, and we’re far too dim and distracted to responsibly make a choice in just weeks or even months. We’re like Lamar Odom at a whore house. We don’t even have sex the first couple of days, that’s just for letting the drugs kick in. If our election season was only two months long, Trump would have won already, in a landslide but time, time is our greatest ally against idiot candidates. Already you’re seeing people tiring of Trump, because he has three pieces of shtick. I’m great, Mexico’s laughing at us, constipated toddler face.”

Follow Ian Hanchett on Twitter @IanHanchett

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