Stop the Presses! Associated Press Discovers Epidemic Of Diaper Rash As Feds Investigate

On Thursday, the Associated Press breathlessly reported that babies in America are getting diaper rash. I swear I am not making this up.

Thursday’s story centered around what is described as “a handful of reports” to the Consumer Product Safety Commission from mothers whose babies have come down with a bad case of diaper rash. But instead of getting the Desitin out of the medicine chest and keeping baby’s bottom nice and dry, these parents have decided to blame the disposable diapers. In this case, it’s the Pampers Dry Max diaper. So far, the CPSC has received what it calls “a handful” of reports.

Let’s put this into context for just a moment. We have this “handful” of reports of diaper rash with moms blaming the diaper rather than the fact that babies just get diaper rash sometimes. Now, compare that fact with this statistic (taken from an alarmist website I’d rather not link to) from Pampers spokeswoman Jodi Allen:

While we take every complaint very seriously and look into every call or email, especially as it relates to babies’ skin health, after exhaustive testing, we have seen absolutely no evidence that the materials used in Pampers Dry Max causes can cause a skin safety issue. This diaper contains the same type of ingredients as our previous Cruisers diaper and in fact, 2.2 billion diapers using Dry Max have already been used in the United States alone.

So – with 2.2 billion diapers and a handful of reports (5), what does that work out to? I think the odds of getting diaper rash from Pampers would be about the same as getting struck by lightning while holding a winning Powerball ticket during a polar bear attack on the French Riviera. That’s like 2.27 x 10 to the -9 power.

Why would any reputable news organization, and I use that term loosely when it comes to the AP, run with such a story? A “handful of reports” of diaper rash come in and it’s suddenly decided that the culprit is a few of the 2.2 billion diapers sold. With that many diapers sold, I’d guess we’d have millions of complaints if there was a problem with them. Something just isn’t right.

Where is this coming from? Is it the environmental left, which demands that moms return to cloth diapers? Maybe it’s the extremists who say babies shouldn’t wear any diapers at all. Is this percolating up from the plaintiff’s bar with some lawyers looking for a lawsuit? Perhaps it a competitor looking to take Pampers down a notch.

I’m not sure where it’s coming from but I sure know where it’s going. When a news organization like the Associated Press decides that “a handful” of babies with diaper rash is news and that unproved, unfounded accusations against a diaper are an appropriate part of the story, thinking moms can’t help but be a little suspicious.