More Bad News for Paramount: China Sinks 'Noah'

More Bad News for Paramount: China Sinks 'Noah'

While Hollywood is always willing to stand up for human rights against small countries like Brunei that don’t represent much market share, when China isn’t busy forcing women to have abortions, massacring demonstrators, or censoring Hollywood films, Hollywood seizes the opportunity to pepper China’s backside with wet, fevered kisses.

Unfortunately for Paramount, looking the other way to human rights abuses didn’t work. China doesn’t want “Noah.”

This is terrible news for all concerned. Based on its production and estimated promotional budget, “Noah” hasn’t yet broken even. Director Darren Aronofsky’s anti-God, biblical-bait-and-switch epic is close to topping out domestically at $99 million. Overseas it is pretty much played out with just $233 million.

A theatrical run in China would have likely put “Noah” over the top.

My suggestion to Paramount would be to sit down with the Chinese authorities, and after you are done smooching their fascist backsides, tell them the truth about “Noah”; that the movie is really on their side, every bit as  anti-God and religious as they are; that the whole idea was to pull one over on America’s Christian rubes.

Then someone in the meeting should agree to a forced abortion, just to show solidarity.

The money will flow like the blood of Chinese freedom fighters.

P.S. Sources tell me that the blood of Chinese freedom fighters is what’s used as ink when China censors a willing Hollywood’s movies and scripts.



Follow John Nolte on Twitter @NolteNC