Hello and Welcome to the Dangerous Faggot Tour brought to you by Phi Alpha Gamma. I am Milo Yiannopoulos, the Frattiest Fag on the Internet.
Don’t I look good in black? Almost as good as black looks in me. Which incidentally is where I got this outfit. I don’t know what he wore home.
Yesterday was Halloween, or “All Hallow’s Eve” as it is known where I’m from. A day where the dead rise and walk among us. And like all dead people seem to do, I’m told they are voting for Hillary Clinton.
Hillary of course is practically a zombie, who else would the dead vote for?
Speaking of the undead, I hear Bernie was on campus a few hours ago. I’m sorry you had breathe his second-hand coffin breath.
It’s time to inject some vitality back into Dartmouth.
That’s right, we are exactly one week away from what Michael Moore has said would be “the biggest fuck you in the history of American politics”: Daddy Trump winning the election.
If Hillary wins, the struggle for freedom of speech in American and especially on campus becomes even more important, given a crazy social justice warrior president and a stacked supreme court that thinks the constitution is toilet paper.
But if Trump pulls this off, it will be not only a potential turning point in the history of this nation, but a landmark win for masculinity.
It’s true isn’t it? This election can be viewed as a battle between a man who epitomizes pure masculinity vs. a woman who epitomizes man-hating feminism. An unapologetic billionaire playboy who has spent his life chasing beautiful women, making millions dollar deals, building massive estates, and shit-talking anyone who gets in his way.
On the other hand we have someone who, is, well … she’s a woman! That’s feminism, right? Get a woman in office no matter how terrible a president they’d be and how many laws they’ve broken.
I’m sure we will all feel stunning and brave for electing a hospital bound globalist in an ugly pantsuit while the ballistic missiles turn the earth into a fireball.
I was trying to decide which topic would best suit my first Ivy League appearance on the tour. I was leaning toward a speech about Black Lives Matter for a while, but decided that you guys didn’t need me to tell you that those people are batshit insane:
I love this school. Such creativity and imagination You’ve even got fake Indians! Your own native american program director is a fake indian. Maybe the idiotic leftists in your state can vote her into office like Elizabeth Warren.
I’ll save all that for another stop. Tonight I’m taking on another strand of left-wing outrage: the cucks who demonize hazing, greek life, and masculinity in our society as a whole.
There has never been a society that wasn’t constructed on the backs of men. It is a simple biological fact, and apparent to anyone who bothers to look around, that finding a woman digging dirt on a construct site or fixing a pothole in the street is about as common as finding an attractive feminist. It’s very simple, fatties; men built the roofs over your head, the floors under your feet, and the gyms you should be signing up for.
Camille Paglia, a dissident lesbian feminist, discussed this phenomenon in her breakout book Sexual Personae, and summed it up with one irrefutable quote:
“If civilization had been left in female hands, we would still be living in grass huts.”
Men are by nature competitive, aggressive, and can be maniacally driven. This is a hormonal and behavioral fact, reflected throughout the history of humanity. It explains why men commit nearly all of the violent crime, but it also explains why men have invented and built nearly everything you own. And also got to the fucking moon.
In fact, if you read the definitive history of the Apollo program, by the great Charles Murray, you’ll find that the young men who made moon shots possible lived in settings very similar to Dartmouth’s own Animal Houses, supervised by older men so tough-talking they’d make Indiana’s notorious coach Bobby Knight blush.
So women should want men to be MEN, in order to drive society forward. Men invented the washing machine and the pill. Men invented the dishwasher and the car. Men invented all the labor-saving appliances that have liberated the time and energy of women. If this is a patriarchy at work, it a remarkably generous and self-destructive one.
But women should also want men to be MEN for all sorts of reasons. As Paglia wrote in Time magazine in 2013:
“When an educated culture routinely denigrates masculinity and manhood, then women will be perpetually stuck with boys, who have no incentive to mature or to honor their commitments. And without strong men as models to either embrace or resist, women will never attain a centered and profound sense of themselves as women.”
Feminist reject this kind of thinking but it is not compatible with their gender-bending, non-binary, worldview in which gender is a social construct propagated by a misogynistic patriarchy. But all this is doing is denying biology. Men and women are different, we have different tendencies, skills, and behaviors. This should be accepted and fostered, not demonized. Because the end result is simply more effeminate men, and more masculine women. Who wants that?
In fact, those of you who’ve been using my words to get the education your own colleges are too busy overcharging you to provide, you may remember that in my take-down of chicks in combat I quoted another foreign visitor to these shores, who warned of exactly this horrific sign of American decline.
About two centuries ago, Alexis de Tocqueville warned that democratic capitalist societies would need to stress la différence between the sexes even more than aristocracies. Otherwise, he predicted, you’ll end up with “weak men and disreputable women.” Well. Just look at Bill and Hillary. Or Huma and her Wiener.
This backward, science-denying feminism has wormed its way into all of the most influential institutions in society: academia, entertainment, and media.
Feminist journalists are now demanding that toy stores make themselves “gender neutral” — marketing toys that girls prefer to boys, and toys that boys prefer to girls. And toy stores are listening! Feminists are telling Hollywood studios to remake beloved classics like Ghostbusters into unfunny, female dominated flops, and Hollywood studios are listening! We are not far from toy stores stocking Iron Man butt plugs, and Disney cartoons with tranny heroes.
It’s in academia, and not just the insane asylums known as American colleges. Even more concerning, it starts as early as kindergarten. Camille Paglia says that “Primary education does everything in its power to turn boys into neuters.”
They are punished for demonstrating typical boyish behavior, and are thrown on medication if they don’t comply to female behavioral standards. “Lad culture” in the UK and “frat culture” in the US are now used as pejoratives, to demonize men and male pastimes.
Popular YouTuber Stefan Molyneux did some research into the portrayal of men and father figures in the media. He found that the male figure in TV shows is increasingly becoming the butt of the jokes. “In recent years, you can’t watch television – both the shows and commercials – without men being depicted as functionally retarded mouthbreathers, barely able to tie their shoes.” They force horribly unfunny female “comedians” on us, and then call us sexist when we tell them their work sucked.
The video game press tried to turn on men, even though they constitute almost all of their user base. Games journalists decided games without blowing heads off, hot babes, and explosions were the future. But without those, all you can do in games is walk around in real life. Something progressives might like to try some time.
The Media Hates Men
Look at how all of these male journalists reacted to the Trump Tapes. They were “appalled.” They said it was “beyond the pale.” They waged a phony war on “locker room talk,” as if they had never heard or talked about getting pussy before. Well it’s a lie. And every single guy in this room knows it’s a lie. If I had a hot mic on all the private bullshitting sessions with your mates, I guarantee I’d be able to leak a tape as “shocking” as Trumps.
And there is nothing wrong with this. But the left wants you to be “outraged” by it. They hate the idea that, when behind closed doors, men don’t give a single fuck about their phony political correctness standards and language policing. They just let their guards down and banter, without a care in the world for “microaggressions.” It is a safe space away from “safe spaces.”
Because men don’t bond by eating bon bons and watching Desperate Housewives. They bond by telling dark jokes and brutally roasting each other. If a guy hasn’t called his friend a “cock-sucking faggot” at least once in the past week, they aren’t really friends. Taunting is how men bond.
View this dynamic through the lens of female friendships and it may be off-putting. But it makes perfect sense to men. We’re more rough and tumble. Even the fags.
And there may even be some scientific basis to it.
It’s not clear cut, but some studies particularly in the video game world suggest that allowing men to blow off steam in safe verbal or virtual ways may make them less likely to actually commit violent or aggressive acts.
It’s down the same path as the Christian Right’s war on violent video games and rap music in the Early 2000’s. There’s is nothing to suggest that playing Grand Theft Auto is going to make you any more likely to steal a car and beat up a hooker. And there is nothing to suggest that listening to Marilyn Manson is going to make you more likely to shoot up a school.
The Christian Right was wrong then and the Feminist Left is wrong now. And what young men do to bond and blow off steam is no one else’s business.
Which leads us to the easy target of hazing. A practice as old as time, used as a galvanizing exercise for military forces, sports teams, and fraternities alike.
Hazing rituals can include almost anything, from ritual scarring in Papua New Guinea to the trials at the beginning of 300.
Some of these ancient practices still exist today. The black fraternity Omega Psi Phi initiation includes branding the Omega symbol on its new members.
It is based off a fairly simple idea: that requiring new members of a group to go through a challenging period together allows them to form bonds strong as steel. Anyone who has ever played a sport knows that the team never feels closer then after their dickhead coach has put them through an excruciating workout.
It builds character, friendship, and a better understanding of yourself. It’s how guys find out what they are made of. It’s the social equivalent of basic training in the military, or two-a-day practices in sports: pushing you to the limit, testing your mettle.
Here’s a great example of how this kind of manly culture is essential to civilization’s advance. In that history of the Apollo program by Charles Murray I mentioned earlier, here’s how he describes the fiercely difficult, but exciting, all-male culture that took man to the moon: “there they were–young, male, in a high-pressure job, often the only one they’d ever known, many of them single, spending most of their waking hours together, often in remote overseas outposts, led by men they idolized.
The result was more or less what one would expect of such a mix of circumstances–male bonding (a phrase no flight controller would be caught dead using) on a grand scale, and a kind of closeness that many of them would never know again. Along with the excitement went the hell-raising that groups of young men are prone to indulge themselves in.”
And now it is banned on college campuses across the nation. Why? Because it is far too masculine for your lesbianic feminist administrators and their beta male collaborators.
College is said to be the only real time in a man’s life when he was is free to explore and express his masculinity. It is a precious period after he has finally left the guidance of his mother but before he’s settled down with a wife. Can’t we let men have a few years to be themselves? To find out what they are truly made of?
I know what my USMC friends would say. If you want to find out what you’re made of, head to boot camp.
Of course, the war on boys starts a lot earlier, in school. But it’s at college that young men have the most freedom to explore their dark impulses.
But administrators are increasingly adopting a maternal posture during a student’s college experience. They want to nanny and coddle their students. They want control over not only their academic lives, but also their social lives and sexual lives. They want to control, contain, and destroy masculinity.
What they don’t understand is that when masculinity disappears, it harms women too. Why do you think women are getting more and more miserable with every generation? It’s not just because the pill is fucking up their hormones. It’s because men are turning into pathetic cucked betas who can’t satisfy them. Frat boys are perhaps the one group of men outside of the military where that isn’t the case, at least for a little while.
Let’s be clear: no one is forced into hazing. If you don’t want to be hazed, don’t join a fraternity.
Not it is true that I have always been a fan of the ways of the ancient Greeks, so I may be a little biased here.
And it is also true that there have been incidences where hazing has gone too far? Yes absolutely. Very rare, isolated incidents. No more likely than any other drunken incident on college campuses.
Liberals love to play the 99.9% game right? “Did you know than 99.999% percent of Muslims aren’t terrorists?” they’ll incorrectly claim. But here’s one that is true. 99% of hazed college students do not end up in the hospital because of their hazing.
Ohio State University, where I will be visiting on Friday, recently had a high profile hazing incident involving their band. Liberal media outlets wrote breathless articles about the “appalling” incident. The director was fired. The Huffington Post covered it in an article titled “Here Are The Dirty, Sexual Things Ohio State’s Band Did.” And it goes on to describe…nicknames. I’m going to read the offensive names these deviants reportedly called each other, and you are not allowed to laugh:
- “Pat Fenis”
- “Mushroom Stamp”
- “Sugar Bush”
- “Taint Brush”
- “Tits Mcgee”
- “Twat Thumper”, and
- “Twinkle Dick”
This, along with some mild sexual acts like placing a banana between your legs and putting a condom on it, is what caused all this outrage. Compared to ancient hazing rituals, which usually ended up with some participants hacked to death with swords, today’s hazing is downright delicate.
Which brings us to Dartmouth and a student named Andrew Lohse.
In 2012 Andrew, a former member of the Sigma Alpha Epsilon fraternity at Dartmouth, went to Rolling Stone with a horror hazing story that was the subject of a piece titled Confessions Of An Ivy League Frat Boy: Inside Dartmouth’s Hazing Abuses.
And considering Rolling Stone’s stellar record when it comes to shock pieces about frat culture on college campuses, we can be sure to trust every word of it.
I jest, of course.
In the piece, Andrew details many of the disgusting hazing rituals he witnessed and experienced during his time at Dartmouth, including pledges:
– being beaten by brothers
– being forced to crawl through the legs of naked brothers, and
– being forced to fuck a frozen turkey
Which reminds me, I’m applying to Dartmouth after this tour.
The most egregious tale of hazing he revealed involved being forced to swim in a pool full of what he described as piss, shit, vomit, and ejaculate. Or as I call it, Tuesday!
But it turns out that he was black out drunk when he swam in it, and everyone else who swam in it that night vehemently asserts that the pool actually consisted of food products like water, bread, vinegar, soy sauce and salsa. Gross, yes. But not inhumane.
And it also turns out that Andrew himself had already been suspended for a year after getting busted for using cocaine and then assaulting the witness, and had more recently dropped out after being arrested for drunkenly throwing a chair at a campus security guard at 6 in the morning.
This is the credible source the Rolling Stone used as their poster boy.
His former friends describe him as someone who is incapable of taking responsibility for his own actions, and consistently playing the victim. It should come as no surprise then that during his brief stint at Dartmouth he wrote for the liberal Dartmouth Free Press.
Now there were some rituals he described that were certainly disgusting and were not challenged by any of the brothers in SAE. But no one forced him to stay in the frat if he thought the hazing was over the line. No one forced him to join the frat in the first place. And hell, no one forced him to attend such a Greek-oriented college to begin with!
And yet still, after Andrew’s tattling, *ahem* I mean, “revealing,” Dartmouth’s administrators set up an additional task force dedicated to cracking down on hazing.
The truth is that by and large, on the whole, none of these hazing rituals are really all that bad. The worst you’ll get is someone asking you to sit in the cold for a bit or drink something disgusting.
MIKE MA: DRINK IT, FAGGOT
In fact I really don’t see the big deal about this stuff. What else you got?
SQUAD RUSHES THE STAGE, WATERBOARDS MILO, SLAPS HIM IN FACE, SQUIRTS WHIPPED CREAM IN HAIR.
University administrators across the nation have been cracking down on Greek life. Why? Because they see them as an existential threat to their feminist agenda. They want a culture of numales, neutered bearded people who want to hug muslims not defend their country. A place where men can be manly and women can be womanly. It is your gender studies’ department’s worst nightmare. And it drives them insane.
In a way, it makes sense that the same administrators who hate Western civilization – and are ripping out of your curriculum the highest achievements of that civilization’s artists and thinkers — would try to stamp out the kind of male camaraderie on which that civilization was built, going as far back as my ancient Greek ancestors.
And by the way, the initiations those ancient Greeks put the lads through were more like one of my Friday nights than a Friday night at Blutarsky’s Delta House.
But those ancient rituals, however kinky, were part of a larger appreciation of masculinity that wasn’t aimed at keeping the womenfolk DOWN; it was aimed at keeping everyone FREE. So I guess that’s another reason for your campus brownshirts to hate it.
As the distinguished historian Paul Rahe has written, the ancient Greek polis used the harsh natural rituals of adolescent males to make boys into men and bind them into a force strong enough to maintain their city’s freedom. The Greek polis, he said, “rested on its citizen militia and fell only when that militia was overwhelmed.
The modem distinction between soldier and civilian did not pertain in the classical republics, and when that distinction emerged and the professional soldier became a figure of genuine importance–initially in Greece in the age of Philip of Macedon (359-36 B.c.) and Alexander the Great (336-23 B.C.), and again later at Rome in the time of Marius, Sulla, Pompey, and Caesar–freedom’s existence became quite tenuous.
Got freedom? Thank a man, or rather, thank all the men willing to die so the rest of us can go fetal in our safe spaces if somebody hurts our feelings.
One of the reasons the feminist left hates Trump so much is that in so many ways he represents that classical Greek ideal. He’s a lot like Julius Caesar, stabbed in the back by people who should have been supporting him. Et tu, Paul Ryan?
He’s a patrician, loathed by the elites, who earned love and honor from the people. Someone whom history will judge more kindly than his contemporaries.
Look, don’t be idiots. Don’t haze your freshmen into the hospital. And do try not to break the law.
But don’t let these miserable self-righteous pussies ruin your college experience either. In modern society, there are fewer and fewer opportunities for men to be men.
For masculinity to flourish in all its glory. For daring and risk-taking to live free, or at least relatively free. Fraternities are one of those places. They deserve to be protected.
Thank you for coming, and I would be happy to take some questions.
Written from prepared remarks.