'Texas Chainsaw 3D' Review: Venerable Horror Franchise Cheapened by Sorry Script, Effects

'Texas Chainsaw 3D' Review: Venerable Horror Franchise Cheapened by Sorry Script, Effects

The positive side to seeing “Texas Chainsaw 3D” the first week of 2013 is that the year can only go up from here.

The seventh film in the “Texas Chainsaw” franchise has undoubtedly the worst script of them all. It does the horrifyingly creative franchise no justice.

The film was supposedly shot in 3D, but the 3D is so bad, it doesn’t even look like it could have been converted, let alone shot, in 3D. If for some reason, you decide to see this dreadful film, skip the third dimension and save yourself the extra bucks.

“Texas Chainsaw 3D” picks up where Tobe Hooper’s 1974 classic “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre” left off. In the small town of Newt, Texas, people went missing for decades without a trace, and many suspected the Sawyer family. Suspicions were confirmed when on one summer day, a girl escaped the Sawyer home after four of her friends were murdered. Shortly after, a large group of locals came to the Sawyer home, shot the family inside and burned the house to the ground, killing everyone, except for one.

Many years later and far away from Newt, a 20-something girl named Heather (Alexandra Daddario) learns of her estranged grandmother who has left her an estate in Texas. Heather along with her boyfriend Ryan (Trey Songz) and their other friends Nikki (Tania Raymonde) and Kenny (Keram Malicki-Sanchez), prepare for a road trip to Texas so Heather can sign some papers and uncover some family history along the way.

Along with Heather’s inheritance is her mentally challenged cousin Jed, otherwise known as Leatherface (Dan Yeager), who has been living in the basement of her grandmother’s Victorian mansion.

What makes “Texas Chainsaw” so painful to watch isn’t the fact that people are getting sliced and diced while their blood is splattering all over the camera and into our 3D glasses; it’s the lazy script, poor special effects and uncaring supporting actors, who appear like they don’t even know what they are doing in a film like this.

Here is where the movie fails miserably. There is a scene in the movie where Trey Songz’s character Ryan, is listening to the song “2 Reasons,” which is Trey Songz’s real-life song. Seriously. It doesn’t get much worse than having a lead character listen to his own song in the film. It completely takes you out of an already bad film.

The one thing that makes this film even remotely redeemable is Alexandra Daddario (some may recognize her from “Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief”). The young actress leads the film incredibly from start to finish; even with the bogus script and the bizarre arc her character endures. It was interesting to see where her character was going to end up next, making her the perfect fit for the “last girl standing.”

Don’t waste your time or money on this movie, or if you must, wait to rent the Blu-ray. “Texas Chainsaw 3D” is an unnecessary sequel and was made to squeeze every last dollar from the fans, not to tell a story: never a good thing for a movie. Fans of the Leatherface films will surely be disappointed and even disgusted, in a bad way.

Note: This film did not screen for critics and is an exclusive review to Breitbart News.

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