Former President Bill Clinton says his high-profile affair with White House intern Monica Lewinsky was one of the things during his presidency that he did to “manage my anxieties,” according to The Daily Mail.
In the forthcoming documentary, “Hillary,” Clinton recalls how the pressure of being president made him feel like a boxer who had fought 30 rounds and that his fling with Lewinsky was “something that will take your mind off it for a while.”
“Nobody thinks they’re taking a risk,” the former president explains. “That’s not why we do stupid things.”
In 1998, the House of Representatives impeachment Clinton over the affair and was acquitted by the Senate.
Clinton reveals that he first lied to Hillary about what had happened with the then-White House intern, but later came clean after it becomes cleary he wasn’t telling the truth,
“I went and sat on the bed and talked to her. I told her exactly what happened, when it happened. I said I feel terrible about it,” he says. “We’ve been through quite a bit in the last few years. I said I have no defense, it’s inexcusable what I did.”
Hillary recounts that she was “devastated” by the admission and, at first, refused to believe it was true.
“I could not believe it. I was so personally just hurt and I can’t believe this, I can’t believe you lied,” the twice-failed presidential candidate recalled, adding that subsequent marriage counseling was “painful.”
The decisions were “one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do, but it was necessary,” said the former president. “She deserved it, Chelsea deserved it and I needed it.”
Clinton then apologized to Lewinsky in the four-hour film, saying he felt ‘”terrible” that the affair will follow her for her entire life.
“I feel terrible about the fact that Monica Lewinsky’s life was defined by it, unfairly I think,” he says, before suggesting that she move on from the controversy. “Over the years I’ve watched her trying to get a normal life back again, but you’ve got to decide how to define normal,” he said.
Hillary, a Hulu-produced documentary about her life, is slated for release Friday.