Madonna: I'm Studying the Koran

Madonna, in an attempt to regain relevancy, has chosen a new path to “shock” the Western world: she’s studying the Koran. In a relentlessly self-aggrandizing piece about her life in Vanity Fair titled “Truth or Dare,” Madonna reveals the shocking truth that she has always tried to stretch the cultural envelope. Who knew?

Madonna’ deep philosophy is reflected in these timeless words:

If I can't be daring in my work or the way I live my life, then I don't really see the point of being on this planet.

She traces the source of her inspiration:

. . . I would pull myself together and look at a postcard of Frida Kahlo taped to my wall, and the sight of her mustache consoled me. Because she was an artist who didn't care what people thought. I admired her. She was daring. People gave her a hard time. Life gave her a hard time. If she could do it, then so could I.

Of course, there were her sexual fantasies:

I was also wearing as many crucifixes around my neck as I could carry, and telling people in interviews that I did it because I thought Jesus was sexy. Well, he was sexy to me, but I also said it to be provocative.

No, really?

Not content with making a mockery of Christianity, she tried Judaism next, protesting that she was a student of Kabbalah:

We were talking about God and heaven and hell, but I didn't feel like religious dogma was being shoved down my throat.

Of course, in Jewish tradition you’re supposed to know Jewish law thoroughly before you even consider studying Kabbalah, but tradition isn’t exactly her strong suit.

But poor Madonna was a victim of a heartless society:

I could get my head around people giving me a hard time for simulating masturbation onstage or publishing my Sex book, even kissing Britney Spears at an awards show, but trying to save a child's life was not something I thought I would be punished for . . . I was accused by a female Malawian judge that because I was divorced, I was an unfit mother.

She had a right to be angry. We all want Moms who simulate masturbation on stage, pose naked, and kiss girls.

But now she has another dare for Western society:

I am building schools for girls in Islamic countries and studying the Qur'an. I think it is important to study all the holy books. As my friend Yaman always tells me, a good Muslim is a good Jew, and a good Jew is a good Christian, and so forth.

To Madonna, they are all the same. And she ends her pathetic puff piece with this:

As life goes on (and thank goodness it has), the idea of being daring has become the norm for me. Of course, this is all about perception because asking questions, challenging people's ideas and belief systems, and defending those who don't have a voice have become a part of my everyday life. In my book, it is normal. In my book, everyone is doing something daring. Please open this book. I dare you.


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