Beliebe! We Can Deport Justin Bieber
One benefit of President Obama's lawless and unprecedented rampage of rewriting and ignoring laws as he sees fit (including immigration laws), is that we need not worry if imploding 19-year-old pop star Justin Bieber's recent run-ins with the law rise to the perfect legal standard for deportation. Let's just come together as Americans to pull a collective "Obama" and ship this spoiled, undesirable, downward-spiraling, drain-circling, flash-in-the-pan Canadian back to where he belongs...
A little place I like to call, Not-In-America.
There is nothing we can or could do about the Coreys, the Lindsays, the Mileys, the Pari, or the Brittanys. They are home-grown, red blooded, 100% American train wrecks, and that is on us. But there is absolutely no need for the American taxpayer to pick up the tab to police, community-service, sentence, ankle-monitor, traffic-ticket, or breathalyze a pasty Canuck whose only real talent is looking like Miley Cyrus pre-spray tan.
If nothing else, we should be able to ship Bieber north of the border for carrying a false visa. My understanding is that Bieber is here on an 0-1 visa, which is given to foreigners with "an extraordinary ability … in the arts." You might argue that legions of shallow, stupid, spoiled, hyper-ventilating 12-year-old girls cannot be wrong, but I am old enough to remember this.
In the few short years Bieber has infected our grand country with his metrosexually marginal talents, he is alleged to have egged his neighbors home (presumably an AMERICAN neighbor, though in California you can never be sure), been popped for a DUI while drag racing, reportedly smoked marijuana, and has been caught on video Rapping While Being Canadian -- which if it isn't a felony should be.
Is Bieber imploding? Is he attempting to earn street-cred by egging a house (how so very Canadian)? Or is he just a little spoiled punk making life miserable for working class Americans so he can pose as a thug?
Answering that question should be a Canadian's problem, not mine.
In a world as electronically connected as ours, other than shooting Bieber into the silent void of space (which the Geneva Convention lists as a war crime against space), there is nothing we can do to protect our children from the toxic effect this stunted Vanilla Ice has and will continue to have on our culture.
But that doesn’t mean we have to let him stay in our home.
Every day we deport those who come here with no agenda other than to work hard, keep their head down, pay taxes, raise a family, and pursue the American Dream in a noble and honorable way. But we're housing this little pantywaist and his posse?
No justice, no peace.
Follow John Nolte on Twitter @NolteNC