Carrie Lightfoot: Breaking the Bondage of Fear

Think about this: the average lifespan of an American woman is 81 years old. Conservatively, if a young woman begins to be concerned about her safety at the age of 18, that would mean that she could live 63 years of her life bound to the ever-present fear of being assaulted, kidnapped, carjacked, or murdered. 

The average female is no match for a larger, stronger attacker. Multiply this disparity of size and strength exponentially when she is facing a stoned attacker or, heaven forbid, multiple attackers. Factor in age or physical impairments, and it becomes painfully difficult to imagine the outcome.

Now, I am not saying that women are so disabled by this fear that they cannot function or live healthy, productive lives. Of course, they can, and they do. I will tell you, however, that I believe all women know at some level of their being that they are the prey. 

Every time she gets into her car, leaves a store, goes to a party, enters a parking garage, gets in an elevator, walks down the street, goes for jog,  goes on a date, or simply cuddles up with a good book at home alone, she does these things with the ever-present fear of harm. If that is not bondage, I do not know what is. 

But here is the good news: the bondage is not necessary.

If you are a woman reading this article, keep thinking about yourself as you read this. If you are a man, think about the women in your life, whom I know you fiercely desire to protect and keep safe.  Now place yourself or any of the precious women in your life into any one of the dozens of news stories you hear on any given day of a woman brutally attacked or murdered. What would you or she have done? Would you or she have been able to fight him or them off? As painful as this exercise is and as uncomfortable as it makes you, perhaps you can see why it is vitally important that all women be given the tools and the training to defend themselves and their loved ones.

I hated guns. As a mother, I would not allow one in my home, nor would I let my children play with toy guns. Honestly, I had what I thought was the “normal” amount of concern for my life and safety and that of my four children, but I never thought about or asked myself what I would do if certain situations arose. Then, life changed. Violence touched me. I write this article with a deep understanding of the realities of violence and with a new understanding of what it means to be the prey. It can touch any one of us, in any place, on any day.

Historically, women have been the protected gender. Entrusting their protection to the men in their worlds, to law enforcement, or even to the government. But in today’s world, we can no longer rely on any of the above to be where we are at that moment when the vile face of violence is upon us.

I am passionately driven to educate all women and to provide accurate, untainted information on what it means to be an armed self-protector. Yes, I believe the gun is the great equalizer on the uneven battlefield of violence. I did not want a gun, but when the time came for me to say “Not me” and “Never again will I be a victim,” there was no denying that a gun was the only tool I could use to truly protect myself and equalize the disparity of force that I was born to endure.  

Freedom is defined as the state of not being imprisoned or enslaved. It is time to break the chains of the bondage of fear and for women to be truly free. We need to lose the weighty ball and chain and live out those 63 years in confidence. The confidence that we are our own self-protectors and our own first responders. An armed and trained woman is a free woman.

Carrie Lightfoot is the founder of The Well Armed Woman and a guest columnist for Down Range with AWR Hawkins.