A Joyless, Unhappy Independence Day on the Left

Fourth of July
AP Photo/Evan Vucci

That liberal relative who insists on adding an unwanted addendum to the Thanksgiving prayer—”Please, God, forgive us for what we did to the Indians, for our racism, for our evil capitalism, and especially for the disposable plastic bags at the grocery store”—seemingly shows up at everybody’s dinner table. That downer dud crashes the fireworks on the Fourth of July, too.

Independence Day holds no immunity from the joyless negativity of the Left.

A brief search around the internet reveals the Left to have taken the sacred American celebration and done their best to find everything possible wrong with it. Their efforts to tear down anything and everything we hold sacred as a nation works in full force on this special day.

Vox.com felt the need to inform their readers about how America sucks with “3 Reasons the American Revolution Was a Mistake.” The Vox writer insinuated that the pesky Constitution that stands in the way of making policy might have been avoided if only we had more closely imitated the British:

But I’m reasonably confident a world where the revolution never happened would be better than the one we live in now, for three main reasons: slavery would’ve been abolished earlier, American Indians would’ve faced rampant persecution but not the outright ethnic cleansing Andrew Jackson and other American leaders perpetrated, and America would have a parliamentary system of government that makes policymaking easier and lessens the risk of democratic collapse.

The Vox article cites Britain’s “carbon tax” as one such sensible policy Americans senselessly ignore to buttress its thesis.

Slate.com finds the Fourth of July a suitable occasion to post this headline: “The Star-Spangled Banner is a Lousy Piece of Songwriting.” This appeared as the headline on their homepage. One simple click revealed an even more negative headline: “Proudly Hailed: ‘The Star-Spangled Banner’ Is Militaristic, Syntactically Garbled, and Impossible to Sing. It’s Perfect.” Apparently written in prior years, the piece found rebirth on Slate again this year. Mother Jones informs, “America’s Barbeque Grills Create as Much Carbon as a Big Coal Plant” and Al Jazeera America similarly tells readers, “Independence Day Fireworks Lead to Spike in Air Pollution.” Salon features: “America’s Most Toxic Obsession: The Violent History of ‘Real Americans.'”

The U.S. government wants you to grill fruit to celebrate Independence Day, which makes my hot dogs and hamburgers even tastier now that putting them on the grill stands as a small act of defiance against their vegan suggestions.

You can hopefully declare your independence from the negative family liberal to enjoy your day. As for my family, we are blessed to be one of the few without that killjoy—as we have been for years since life experiences brought me to appreciate the importance of liberty and turn away from blaming America for all the world’s ills.

Follow Breitbart Texas Managing Director Brandon Darby on Twitter: @brandondarby