Artist Bailout: $50 Million Not Enough

So it turns out that HR1, Obama’s giant stimulus bill that’s going to save the world, one contraceptive, lawn care company, STD prevention program at a time has a little coin for all us starving artists. Well, probably not all us starving artists. Probably only the ones who are government and NEA approved. You know, all those right-wing expressionist types. However, if you think the currently allocated $50 million just isn’t enough (the cost of camel hair brushes being what they are these days) there’s a handy petition you can click over to (conveniently listed at the bottom of this post, so as not to divert your attention from this scintillating prose) where a group of artist is requesting a meager 1% (that’s $8.19 billion of the current $819 billion dollar behemoth) stimulus bill while simultaneously asking that President Obama appoint a Secretary of the Arts.

Hey, I’m all for it. I mean, there are at least a dozen black-box theaters in the Valley that could use a coat of paint. And it’s imperative that at this time of world-wide crises, where the country is engaged in two wars, we take the time to really bear down and work on a getting top flight Secretary of the Arts. It’s just what we need because… uh… of…uh… you know. I mean, come on people!

And as filmmakers I feel we should get a crack at the cash (though I regret not being able to apply for it in person as my Gulfstream is in the shop). “Our generation deserves no less.”

I mean if you think about it, a film really fits well into the whole stimulus plan. It’s an expensive, short-term project that pays a select group of people a relatively high wage and if we start working on one right now, we probably won’t get it off the ground for at least a year, maybe two if we really drag out development. Perfect! Who’s in with me? I have a million ideas. In fact, I think this is the perfect opportunity to do that great Horatio Alger adaptation I’ve been dreaming about.

(http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/artsstimulus/index.html)