Nolte: Bud Light Sales Continue to Collapse for the CNN of Beers

Instagram/Dylan MulvaneyGoogle
Instagram/Dylan MulvaneyGoogle

Nationwide sales of Bud Light crashed 23.3 percent during the week of April 29 compared to the same week last year. The previous week’s sales had declined 23.6 percent.

Anheuser-Bush is facing something MUCH worse than a boycott (more on this below), and it’s affecting the beleaguered company’s other brands.

Budweiser is down 9.7 percent, Michelob Ultra’s down 2.9 percent, and Natural Light is down 2.5 percent. Those numbers have improved slightly over the previous week.

Bump Williams, chief executive of Bump Williams Consulting, the outfit that tracks these numbers, told the New York Post: “This seems to be where the brand’s weekly declines have started to settle, falling in that -20% range over the past few weeks.”

To understand how big of a revenue decline that 23.3 percent drop is, last year’s sales of Bud Light hit $4.8 billion. Lop 23 percent off that $4.8 billion, and you’re looking at a billion-dollar—with a “B”—loss. Meanwhile…

During that same week, Pabst Blue Ribbon sales jumped 21.6 percent, and Miller High Life gained 10.4 percent.

All of this relates back to Transheuser-Busch’s stupid decision to do business with the transvestite Dylan Mulvaney, a guy who puts on a dress and prances around like an astonished reindeer mocking women.

According to “experts,” Transheuser-Busch will try to solve its problem in two ways…

First, there will be the Lipstick on a Pig Strategy with a redesign of the can. Good luck with that.

Second will be the Condescending to Red America with Stereotypes Strategy that could look like this: “investing heavily in sports marketing, and incorporating the US military and country and western music, farmers, law enforcement, and first responders into their advertising.”

How about some T&A?

How about some babes in string bikinis?

Just an idea.

Of course, the Condescending to Red America with Stereotypes Strategy already blew up in Bud’s face once already. But, hey, I’m no expert. The second time might work.

Sarcasm aside, the problem here is likely irreversible. Bud Light, which had been the top beer brand in the country, is now the CNN of beers. Like CNN, Bud Light is brand-damaged. It has become a joke, a punchline, and a way for normal people to bond, find, and then commiserate with one another over our cancerous culture.

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Credit: @luistejadabostonrealtor/LIFESTYLOGY /TMX

What I mean is this…

For years now, the easiest way to bond with a group of strangers in a waiting room was to say something sarcastic about CNN. For example, if the waiting room TV is tuned to HGTV, you can win an easy laugh by saying, At least they’re not making us watch CNN. I’ve done this. The effect is immediate. Everyone rolls their eyes and loosens up. Conversations and bonding follow.

Imagine all the Bud Light jokes fired off in bars and backyard barbecues throughout our great country. Now imagine how these jokes help normal people find each other by discovering they are not alone in their disgust at Big Businesses’ demonic quest to normalize what is either a mental illness or sexual fetish.

One thing the dominant culture is still pretty good at is making normal people feel outnumbered. That’s what’s so great about the implosion of CNN and Bud Light. Those brands have become like the fish symbol ancient Christians used to find one another.

It’s hard to see how Bud Light overcomes this. Like CNN, the beer company made a potentially fatal mistake moving to the far left. Once you do that, there’s no coming back. You lose normal customers. Worse still, the left destroys you when you try to win those normal customers back. This happened to CNN last week with Donald Trump’s town hall. The left is already threatening Transheuser-Busch.

Follow John Nolte on Twitter @NolteNC. Follow his Facebook Page here.

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