Delingpole: Turkeys In Lame-Duck Parliament Vote For Christmas; General Election Finally On

LONDON, ENGLAND - OCTOBER 29: Supporters and critics of Brexit are seen through the trails
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James Delingpole

So turkeys do vote for Christmas. Finally, Britain is going to the polls and running the general election which the Remainer Establishment had sought so hard to prevent happening.

As Sherelle Jacobs explains here in the Telegraph, MPs voted for the basest of reasons:

It has been quite something to see slick Remainers cook their own goose through a mixture of incompetence and greed. The Liberal Democrats – the Stop Brexit party – has just voted for an election that makes Brexit overwhelmingly more likely, so they can make a cynical land grab for Labour seats.

Meanwhile, Labour has voted for its own funeral partly in a desperate attempt to save face, and partly because Jeremy Corbyn knows his days are numbered as leader – he would prefer to end his career embracing the warm socialist bosom of glorious defeat, rather than becoming the victim of a Left-wing purge.

Why was the Remainer Establishment so keen to avoid a general election? Because it knows it is going to lose this one, big time.

By Christmas — the election is on December 12, so plenty of time for celebrations afterwards — for the first time in history, Britain will have not just a Conservative party that’s pro-Brexit but also a government that is majority pro-Brexit.

Better still, almost, here are some of the faces you’ll never, ever have to see again, unless maybe you spot them rummaging around your local food bank, on the seat next to you at your ‘Coding for Beginners’ evening class, or on one of those photocopied pages of ‘Do you remember who the hell any of these obscure people were?’ they give you at the beginning of pub quizzes.

Anna Soubry

Dominic Grieve

Nick Boles

Rory Stewart

‘Sir’ Oliver Wetwin

Guto Bebb (But is he a Star Wars character or an actual person? Play the ‘Star Wars character or MP?’ game here)

Kenneth Clarke

Phil Hammond

…and last but by no means least unless you’re talking about height…

John Bercow

And that’s before we take into account all those Labour MPs, not that any of them were recognisable, who are going to lose their seats in the coming Great Purge.

Sure it’s not going to be all roses.

There are doubts about whether Boris Johnson’s deal really will deliver the Brexit we voted for or whether — as Nigel Farage and others in the Brexit Party argue — it’s just another way of keeping Britain trapped in EU limbo for another generation.

There’s also the possibility — unless they do a deal, which I hope they will — that the Conservatives will end up having their vote split with the Brexit Party and losing lots of seats which they’d expected to win.

I also have my worries as to whether a government led by self-proclaimed ‘One Nation’ Conservative Boris Johnson will really have the ideological backbone to undo any of the damage done by his Labour or Labour-lite predecessors John Major, Tony Blair, Gordon Brown, David Cameron and Theresa May.

Oh — and the less said about those reinstated rebels the better, other than that if any of them represented my constituency I’d definitely be voting Brexit Party not Conservative.

But for the moment as the last truly great Conservative leader would have said, let us ‘Rejoice! Rejoice!’

If parliament had gone on any longer frustrating Brexit, if Speaker John Bercow had been allowed to continue molesting the English constitution like some hideous Hentai octopus, if Jeremy Corbyn had got away with his extraordinary scheme to hand over the franchise to 16-year olds and non-British European residents, then I think we would have had a civil war on our hands.

Now order is restored. Or soon will be. And we can all, I think, breathe a huge sigh of relief.

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