About Last Night on 'Glee': Conservative Trashing? What Conservative Trashing?

The following article contains spoilers. You’ve been warned.

Glee is back! Come on, guys, get excited!

Anyone?

Just me? Well ok then. I’m not afraid to admit, loudly and proudly, I totally heart Glee. I’ve been a fan of high school dramedies since Joey crawled through Dawson’s window, and when you throw musical theatre into the mix … pure entertainment, Baby!

So what if it’s a microcosm of leftist indoctrination that spoon-feeds liberal drivel into eagerly waiting mouths? What isn’t, these days? Cue my theme song, because that’s where I come in. This year I’ll be tuning into Glee and reporting back to you fabulous Big Hollywood readers the blatant misrepresentations of reality that were sung and danced into living rooms across the nation.

Get the facts! Fight the smears!

(Sorry. Couldn’t help it.)

Anyway. The season 3 opener on Tuesday was filled with blog fodder: Cheerleading Coach from Hell Sue Sylvester is running for congress, the only stable relationship continues to be the one between gay boys, and Quinn tries to ‘find herself’ by dying her hair pink and lighting a purple piano on fire with a cigarette.

Sue Sylvester gains in the polls by announcing that she wants to cut all funding for the arts at public schools. She goes on the local news station to tell parents they’re going to have to pay for music lessons themselves, because taxpayers don’t care if your kids can sing or not. Or something to that effect. You know, because Tea Party people are monsters that hate children. And music.

Glee creator Ryan Murphy denies that the election plotline is a mockery of the Tea Party, but Jane Lynch (the actress that plays Sue) says of her character: “She’s going to be more right-wing than Michele Bachmann.”

She even got glitter-bombed. Yeah. I’ll let you guys judge whether or not Glee is mocking conservatives for yourselves.

In high school relationship news, the teenagers are still super slutty. In one scene, Santana and Brittany try to convince Quinn to come back to the Cheerios and glee club by referring to their trio as the unholy trinity, and making light of the fact that they had all slept with Puck the previous year. I bonded with other girls in high school by sharing lip-gloss, by the way.

The only stable relationship continues to be the one between Kurt and Blaine, the flamboyant gay boys. Blaine actually leaves his prestigious private school to join his boyfriend at McKinley High, because he can’t stand to be away from the one he loves so much.

Fine. Go ahead and have a happy gay couple. But pretty please with a cherry on top could we see some happy hetero teens in committed and loving relationships? Pffft. Teenagers in committed and loving relationships. Like that’ll happen on primetime. Well, I guess it does … but only if they’re gay.

Oh yeah, and Quinn rocks a new hairdo and a bad attitude. I foresee a Janis Joplin cover in the near future.

It’s going to be awesome.

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