Nolte: Media’s 9 Lamest Excuses for Joe Biden’s Serial Young Girl-Touching

Vice President Joe Biden talks to a young girl as he met with students outside two schools
AP Photo/Matt Rourke

Before we get down to it, I want you to imagine the reaction from CNN or the Washington Post or Joe Scarborough’s latest wife or Whoopi Goldberg if there was even one video … not countless, like we have of Joe Biden: Serial Young Girl-Toucher … but just one video of Clarence Thomas or Brett Kavanaugh doing…


Or this.

Or OMG this.

Does anyone believe that just one video like that would not have resulted in Thomas and Kavanaugh not only being disqualified from serving on the Supreme Court, but also being labeled a sleazy sex predator for life?

Does anyone believe Trump would be president with all those videos circulating around out there?

Hey, I’m not claiming Biden is a sexual predator, but come on… If you are not a powerful Democrat protected by the media, I dare you to try slithering up behind a co-worker to sniff her hair and plant a kiss.

You can’t do that.

When was that kind of behavior ever okay?

I’m nearing a hundred years-old, and I can tell you it never was.

But if you’re Joe Biden, if you’re Barack Obama’s former wingman, if you’re “in,” if our corrupt and sullied Elite Establishment likes you… then it is okay, even after two women have come forward to say it wasn’t  even 28 years after Anita Hill definitely made it not okay.

But, you see, Joe’s serial young girl-touching gets a pass because Joe polls best against Trump. And that is the only value the Elite Establishment holds: that is their warped idea of integrity.

So here they are, folks, our moral superiors, our betters, our guiding light towards all that is good and decent in America, our tastemakers and kingmakers… Two women have already accused Joe of touching them inappropriately, but that’s okay because Orange Bad Man.

  1. Wall Street Journal’s Peggy Noonan

“Joe Biden is a longtime American political figure who came from the fleshy world of sixties and seventies politics when everybody started to hug and kiss … we’re hugging. We’re kissing, all that stuff is going on.”

Oh, Peggy, bless your heart.

Name one other American politician from Biden’s generation who behaves this way. I’m not talking about accusations like those against Trump, a man who had never been accused of any wrongdoing until he ran for president.

Peggy, show me one — ONE — politician from the “fleshy” era that behaves this way. One.

What an idiotic thing to say.

  1. The View’s Whoopi Goldberg

“I don’t want Joe to stop doing that.”

It doesn’t matter what YOU want, Rape-Rape, what matters is what the women involved want, and how many women want a man who is not their husband to slither up behind them, caress their shoulders, take a whiff, and plant a wet one?

If someone did that to my wife, I’d knock them on their ass, and if I did that to someone, my wife would knock me on my ass.

  1. The View’s Meghan McCain

Oh, so now when you’re polling the strongest against the Orange Bad Man, touching a woman inappropriately is “empathy.”

That’s like calling “rape” unwanted affection.

  1. New York Times’s David Brooks

And at the far-left New York Times, when you touch a woman inappropriately while polling the strongest against Trump, it’s called “a connection.”

And if Biden kills your dog, it’s “pest removal.”

And if Biden steals your car, he’s taking over the payments.

God, I hate these people.

  1. Twitter’s Bill Kristol

Translation: Serial young girl-touching okay when Orange Man Bad.

  1. Susan Rice

Sorry, but this is not about YOU… No one cares if you are okay with Gropey Joe. That’s not how this works. You were okay with lying about the death of an American ambassador. You were okay with setting terrorists free. You were okay with calling a traitor a war hero.

Hate to break this to you, cupcake, but you are not exactly the American Barometer for what’s okay,

  1. CNN Fake Republican Ana Navarro

“I don’t like this entire discussion around Joe Biden … it was not sexual harassment … we are cheapening the #MeToo movement … his unwelcome affection.”

“Unwelcome affection,” y’all…

Unwelcome affection like, say, “grabbing them by the pussy?”

TRANSLATION: “Look at Joe’s poll numbers! For the love of all that is holy, look! The Orange Man is bad — so very, very bad… What’s a few victims when the Orange Man is Bad?!? We protected Bill Clinton. We can do this again! God, I love pudding.”

  1. MSNBC’s Mike Brzezinski

“He’s a nice guy, he’s not a predator, and this is ridiculous. Let me just say it, this is ridiculous …  Democrats and those on the left who want to tweet me today and go nuts and get all woke, you’re eating your young. You’re eating those who can beat Trump.”

You gotta give Joe Scarborough’s latest wife credit for honesty.

  1. The Far-Left Washington Post

“Joe Biden’s Affectionate, Physical Style with Women Comes Under Scrutiny.”

That’s the fer-real headline of a straight news story at the Washington Post.

One question… When does Joe’s affectionate, physical style with children come under scrutiny?

Hey, I’m willing to wait for that scrutiny to come by way of campaign ads during the general election…

Oh, my, yes… I’ll wait.


Follow John Nolte on Twitter @NolteNC. Follow his Facebook Page here.


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