Iowahawk

Attention Hollywood Producers

Why not combine the excitement of the Oscars with the excitement of NASCAR?  I give you the ultimate reality TV cross-demographic ratings bonanza, the NOSCARS – where flaming car wrecks fly into grandstands full of movie actors! I’m only asking

Dresden Bombing

Hippies ruin everything, Exhibit 8,346,788:  My wife and I are currently in Los Angeles on our annual sabbatical from Chicago’s subarctic wintertime cruelties. After a pleasant President’s Day afternoon at the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library in Simi Valley, we returned

Visiting Hours 4 – 6 PM

Sad news from the state whose license plate motto is “Stamped By A Former Governor”: former U.S. Congressman Jesse “Bud Man” Jackson Jr. has reached an agreement with federal prosecutors to plead guilty to charges of misuse of campaign funds.

Chicago, City of Romance

Happy VD from the City of Big Shoulders, where on this date in 1929 a team of Cupids working for St. Scarface famously shot lead arrows through the hearts of Bugs Moran’s boys in the back of a Northside garage. That

You’re In Luck, Fellas

There’s still time to arrange a romantic dinner for that special lady!  

The Quality of Mercy Is Not Strained

In response to Suzi Parker Now Happily Dating Area Man: There comes a time when a man must stand up and demand an end to the public ridicule and incessant cruel humiliation of a fellow human being over a silly

Suzi Parker, Ace Reporter

Something called “Suzi Parker” who writes something called “She The People” at something called “The Washington Post” bagged the scoop of the century earlier today, in a report originally entitled “Sarah Palin’s plan to reach ‘millions of devoutly religious people’

Goofus and Gallant

Exhibit A: a speech which we are now informed was rude, inappropriately confrontational, offensive, insolent, if not downright seditious. Exhibit B: from 2006, a speech which we were then informed was bold, heavily nuanced, gutsy, brilliant, an all-around act of patriotic

Climate Gods Angry

In response to Out of the Mouths of Reporters: After blaming “climate change” (caused, apparently, by my electric Margarita machine) for volcanos, earthquakes, and tsunamis, why the hell not asteroids? I eagerly await some intrepid journo-scientist investigating how climate change

The Decline and Fall of MTV

In response to I’m Single Because of MTV: At the expense of appearing a codger, I was excitedly camped out in front of the Philco TelePictoPhone for the debut of MTV, and let out a cheer when The Buggles heralded Video’s

420 For the GOP

In response to Virginia’s Cuccinelli Cool With Cannabis?: Jerome, speaking as someone who occasionally experiments with marijuana laws, it’s, um, high time. One doesn’t have to own a tie-dyed ferret and a hackysack to realize the waste of the drug

The San Jose Memory-Hole

When it comes to airbrushing away inconveniences, the San Jose Mercury-News can teach those 1938 Soviets a thing or two. Case in point: their story on suspected serial killer Chris Dorner (complete with handy ‘RACISM’ headline and camo-American flag photo)

Oh, It Is On Like Obi-Wan

In response to At Least I Have Dreams: Thanks to Ace’s incessant backbiting, it appears we have lost our reader. So now it’s time to THROW DOWN. Tease my mullet and mesh jersey and Talledega infield manners all you want, but

Setting Things Right

In response to Iowahawk’s Story is Red-Hot, But… It Ultimately Comes from Infowars: Now that I’ve added an update with caveats to my post (thanks Ace), now it’s time to address his passive-aggressive challenge to the natural Alpha pecking order

Judgment Withheld

In response to Iowahawk’s Story is Red-Hot, But… It Ultimately Comes from Infowars: I bow to Ace’s wisdom, and thus encourage readers to take the story with the appropriate asterisks and grains of salt; I did not follow the provenance

This Round's On You

[update: although the link below is to IBD, Ace points out that the apparent original source is the kook site InfoWars. As such, consider it as unverified. – Iowahawk] Your taxpayer dollars at work: the same President who questions your

Paging Dr. Freud

In response to Cui Bono?: Liz, I’m beginning to suspect a lot of lefties support gun control because they simply are unable to imagine having a gun in their own hands and not going on a murderous shooting rampage. “Save

Concerned Law Enforcement Veteran Speaks His Mind

Via SooperMexican, a progressive former LAPD patrolman makes the case for gun control (naughty word alert): “Who in there right mind needs a f***ing silencer!!! who needs a freaking SBR AR15? No one. No more Virginia Tech, Columbine HS, Wisconsin

If It's Yellow Let It Mellow

In response to A fine rant from Senator Paul: John – I should have noted that the clip of Rand Paul demolishing the DoE twit was from March 2011, but your point remains. This is precisely the line of attack

Flush Twice, It's a Long Way to the Department of Energy

Rand Paul drop a deuce on a toilet-regulating bureaucrat, hilarity ensues (hat tip to Say Uncle and Professor Puppyblender): I like to think some of my Twitter shtick (e.g. “I believe in a woman’s right to choose an incandescent lightbulb”) might

What Can Brown Fart For You Today?

Scared of Texas outlaws rustlin’ all of his cash cows? Not Jerry Brown, beloved governor of America’s financial basket case and one-third of it welfare caseload. Nosirree. Mr. Moonbeam laughed off a new Texas ad aimed at luring California businesses

In Defense of Chris Rock

In response to Our Father, who art in the White House: When I think about it, Barack Obama does remind me of my dad as I was growing up: He comes up with confusing arbitrary rules that I’m not suppose

Extraordinary Popular Delusions and the Madness of Crowds

In response to School Disciplinary Actions Over Faux Guns Do More Harm Than Good: After a few months of government-sponsored and media-promoted hysteria over guns, the mass roundup of toddlers and preteens wielding high capacity pointyfingers is hardly surprising.  Lefties

With Apologies to Stephen Sondheim

Isn’t it rich? Aren’t we a pair? You on the ground smoldering Me in mid-air. Send in the drones. Isn’t it bliss? Obama approves. The DOJ now recommends No sudden moves. Where are the drones? Send in the drones.  Just

The Jung and Restless

In response to Psychoanalyzing the Left: Ace – like a lot of cherished lefty ideas,  meritocracy (with wise elders bestowing credentials on the deserving) began with good intentions. Ancient China had civil service service exams as far back as the

Get Hip

Earlier today I tweeted that “conservatism needs more fixie bike Portland hipsters who own boutique cupcake food trucks, and fewer Karl Roves.” I wasn’t being ironic (or meta-ironic). Tweak their pretensions all you want, but nobody has a deeper understanding

Brrrrr

A lot of people have a Super Bowl Sunday ritual. Mine is to bundle up, fill the Thermos, and meet up with Chicagoland’s coldest hot rod show: the annual Bare Bones C.C. Polar Bear Cruise. This year’s edition wended its

Starting a Small Business is Hard, Whines Obama-Worshiping JounoLister

Your Super Sunday schadenfreude breakfast treat: JournoList genius Matt Yglesias has an epiphany while waiting in line for government permits to rent his condo. Maestro, cue sad trombone. Oh the amazing things you discover when you step outside your happy

Technically Not a Photoshop

In response to No Photoshopping? What a bunch of whiny little spoilsports: I am frankly shocked to see Conversation colleagues like John Hayward and Larry O’Connor encouraging the juvenile and insolent manipulation of official government photos against the expressed wishes