Solving the Mystery of the Missing Anti-War Celebrities

Many of us have been wondering what happened to all those bold, principled, sincere anti-war celebrities from the Bush years.  They seem to have crawled under various rocks now that a Democrat President is eager to launch a war of choice against a country that hasn’t attacked American interests.  Wherefore art thou, Sheryl Crow and Bruce Springsteen?  Whassup, Janeane Garofalo?  Not even a peep out of two-fisted anti-war activist Sean Penn?  To mix a little Prince and Shakespeare, his is what it sounds like when doves cry havok and let slip the dogs of war.

Luckily, the Hollywood Reporter dug up left-wing fossils Ed Asner and Mike Farrell to explain why Tinseltown peaceniks have gone AWOL while Barack Obama rushes headlong into war.  The short version is, “because they’re hypocritical partisan jackasses.”  But Asner and Farrell lay down a few specifics.  They want you to know they’re just awfully sore at our Nobel Peace Prize-winning President for beating the war drums yet again:

Asner, 83, and Farrell, 74, both expressed extreme disappointment in Obama for advocating military action.

“What he is talking about in Syria is a potential war crime,” Farrell said. “It will be illegal, and if citizens are killed it certainly could be considered a war crime.”

Even if Obama presents irrefutable evidence that Syrian President Bashar al-Assad used poison gas against civilians, military action is still unwarranted, the two activists say.

“This administration ought to insist that the international community charge [Assad] with a war crime and prosecute him, and in so doing Obama would be following the law instead of flaunting the law,” Farrell said.

“It’s incredibly improper for the president to call for a strike. I have said it everywhere I can and I suspect a lot of others will do the same, but whether there will be an organized effort, I don’t know,” Farrell continued. “We’re talking about the difference between an invasion in Iraq and a limited action in response to the use of chemical weapons in Syria.”

Oh, you and the rest of your empty-suit featherweight lefty buddies have been saying it “everywhere,” have you, Mr. Farrell?  But this is totally different anyway, because it’s going to be a “limited action” – which Team Obama has already revised over fifty times, expanding the target list and escalating the conflict before a single bomb has been dropped.

Ed Asner – that strong, outspoken man of principle – adds that we probably aren’t seeing an organized opposition from his Hollywood buddies because Barack Obama is just moving too gosh-darn fast:

Asner said the lack of an organized effort against war in Syria is a matter of timing. Bush took months to make the case for war in Iraq, giving the antiwar left plenty of time to prepare a response.

“It will be a done deal before Hollywood is mobilized,” Asner said. “This country will either bomb the hell out of Syria or not before Hollywood gets off its ass.”

Say, didn’t you nitwits spend the Bush years howling that he “rushed to war?”  But now you’re saying he moved really slow, which gave you time to protest, unlike your stunned non-reaction to the Obama Blitzkrieg? 

The doddering Asner also comically complains that since the Left couldn’t get Bush arrested for war crimes, they’ve just plumb given up on protesting.  Then he says everyone should read some tough questions on Syria penned by space cadet Dennis Kucinich, and “get off our ass and ask these questions”…. but they probably won’t, because “a lot of people don’t want to feel anti-black by being opposed to Obama.”

How embarrassing.  The funny parts of the Hollywood Reporter piece are the fitful efforts by Asner and Farrell to pretend they’re still free-thinking, tough-minded liberals who are just terribly, terribly upset with Obama and his war-mongering “corporatist” ways.  It’s fun to watch lickspittle partisans squeak that they deserve Profiles in Courage awards for seething in silence.