Cockroaches in the Hospital on Your Chest

Since I turn 50 next month, I’m focused on my Bucket List. There are only 2 things left I haven’t accomplished. 1) I’ve always wanted to be “an airhead on a sitcom.” Of all the roles I’ve played, many of which I wasn’t suited for, strangely, this one has eluded me. 2) Attend a weekly Bible study. So, I am now in a Bible study group on Wednesdays and the rest of the week I pursue airhead roles, which basically means I wait…for an audition. I get about one a year. This year I got an audition for American Pie IV, but I turned it down because of the sexual content.

At my Bible study group this week I was sitting between Mavis and her Chihuahua named Pedro, and Sonia, an Iranian who lived five years in Russia, where she waited to receive her legal U.S. citizenship. I asked Pastor Joel “Why does the Bible say Jesus was from the lineage of King David, if he had no blood from his father in him, since he was born of a virgin? Pastor Joel excitedly replied, “Oh, well turn to Matthew 1 and Luke 3! Mary and Joseph were both descendants of David as you can see by these genealogies. So, the Old Testament prophecy was fulfilled that said the Messiah would be from the priestly (through Nathan) and kingly (through Solomon) lineage of David. The blood of Mary which was from David ran through Jesus. Oh. I always wondered about that.

As we were leaving, Sonia and I started talking about the 48 pages of “Hate Speech” I received on The Huffington Post after my last Big Hollywood article. Sonia said, “When people can’t defend their position on an issue, they attack you personally.”

“Yeah,” I said. “I would love someone to talk me into being a liberal. But they can’t give me one good reason. Take socialized medicine for instance, the ‘Health Care Reform’ that the President is trying to shove through the Senate as quickly as possible. They can’t give me one good reason I should want it. I mean, they say it will be cheaper, but that’s not true, because our taxes will go up to pay for it.”

Sonia told me that when she lived in Communist Russia, her friend had appendicitis and was sent to the hospital. She told Sonia that cockroaches crawled over her chest at night. Sonia then went on to explain that with socialized medicine, desperate patients resort to an “underground” system. Deals are made “under the table.” Deals involving your life! She compared it to the police force there. She said that when you are pulled over for speeding, the police expect you to slip them a folded up bill under your driver’s license. Sonia said, “Did you hear the story about the professor and the classroom? It explains communism so well. The professor told the class that after every test, all the students’ grades would be averaged and all would receive the same grade. So, after the first test, the A students who studied all night and the F students who partied all night, all received a C. As the semester went on, the A students quit studying, and all received an F.”

With no competition, humans reach the lowest common denominator. If capitalism dies, and there is no competition for patients let’s say, doctors will all study and work as little and as poorly as possible…as will hospital maintenance workers. Thus, the cockroaches.

I walked to my car in the parking lot humming the theme from Camelot. At least I got to live at the tail end of a magical place called America. I’m an eyewitness who can tell my grandchildren about a faraway land of freedom where the people who worked the hardest were rewarded. And everyone tried to out perform each other and so, everything was top quality. Houses and cars and pools and food. They were all the biggest and best in the world. And people respected God and humbly thanked Him for their blessings. But gradually, the people started taking their blessings for granted. They started to expect rewards without working for them. They felt entitled. Even the strangers who moved into the land felt entitled. No one thanked God. They even started to mock Him. Bible studies started to be referred to as “Hate Speech” gatherings…Leviticus 26 was a crumpled, yellowed page blowing in the wind…

I put my dog-eared Bible in the back seat of my car and stared at it. Someday soon we both might be “underground.”

My friend Liz called me today, “I think there needs to be a call-to-action rather than just resolving that this is our fate. Obama, who shouldn’t be President in the first place, is systematically destroying this country. It used to be called TREASON. He’s NOT upholding the constitution — that’s treasonous! And we’re just watching as though it’s all right!”

“Okay,” I sighed, “I’ll stay in the fight.”

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