Nolte: ‘Melania’ Humiliates Media, Exceeds Expectations with Best Documentary Box Office Opening in Decade

The legacy media are eating crow once more now that Melania has scored the best box office opening for a documentary in a decade.

Over and over, Trump supporters were taunted by the corporate media about empty theaters, an imminent box office humiliation, and zero advance ticket sales.

Well, reality has once again debunked these serial liars.

The far-left Deadline reports that Melania will close the weekend box office in third place with an $8 million opening, a “result that would mark the best start for a docu in the last decade.”

EntTelligence showed Melania presales overindexing in rural areas with populations under 500,000. Again, license fees plus marketing on this pic equals $75M, but Amazon can afford it, even though those figures don’t make sense for a traditional motion picture studio’s P&L. Are MAGA groups driving sales? Maybe, but that will be sussed out as the weekend goes on. Know this: This isn’t an Angel Studios release fueled by some semblance of fan sales or an Amazon Prime super-ticket.

Or, as the old Variety might have put it, “Stix Hix Nix MSM Prix Lift Melania Pix.”

Within the context of a documentary, Melania is unquestionably and already a success.

But let’s look at feature films from 2025…

You’re gonna love this…

Domestically, Melania has already outgrossed Jennifer Lawrence’s most recent movie.

Domestically, Melania has already outgrossed this Stephen King movie.

Domestically, Melania has already outgrossed the latest from a Coen brother.

Melania drew a bigger opening weekend on fewer screens (1,500) than this Dwayne Johnson movie did on 3,345 screens.

Melania drew more opening weekend ticket sales than this Russell Crowe (nothing against Russell Crowe) movie did opening on 1,802 screens.

Melania sold more opening weekend tickets than this Benedict Cumberbatch/Olivia Colman remake did on 2,700 screens.

Melania scored a better opening weekend than the combined power of Darren Aronofsky and Austin Butler did for this title, which opened on 3,578 screens.

Want more context? Here’s more context…

None of the titles listed above faced a relentless, multi-billion-dollar, coordinated propaganda assault from multinational corporations in the political and entertainment media.

In fact, most of those movies got good-to-great reviews. Some even had Oscar talk swirling around them. And you can bet more than one cost a helluva lot more than the $75 million that went into Melania.

More context…

Unlike those titles listed above, everyone knows Melania is essentially a straight-to-streaming title, but people are still heading to theaters.

Finally, all this pearl-clutching over Amazon spending $75 million on Melania is total horseshit. Melania delivers the world’s two biggest superstars — Donald and Melania Trump — to Amazon Prime for $75 million. You’re going to tell me that’s a bad deal when streaming services regularly drop hundreds of millions of dollars on shitty movies starring Matt Damon and Eddie Muprhy, and on streaming series no one watches?

Our lying, garbage media pulled out all the stops and once again whored out their credibility, hoping that a “failure narrative” would become self-fulfilling.

Well, ha ha.

Once again, the Trumps have made complete fools of the Worst People In The World.

Maybe another tattoo or piercing will help them cope.

John Nolte’s first and last novel, Borrowed Time, is winning five-star raves from everyday readers. You can read an excerpt here and an in-depth review here. Also available in hardcover and on Kindle and Audiobook.