Monday Call Sheet: Dim-Bulb as Steve Jobs, MacFarlane's Obscenely Funny 'Ted'

ASHTON KUTCHER TO PLAY STEVE JOBS IN INDIE BIOPIC

The resemblance is certainly there, it's just that buying Kutcher as someone with an IQ above room temperature is a bit more belief than those of us not from the planet Krypton can suspend.  

This will be the second Jobs biopic. Sony is also putting together a project based Walter Isaacson's best-selling biography.

Jobs' impact on our world can hardly be overstated. His impact on the home computer, the music industry (iPod), film (Pixar), and the telephone (iPhone) was revolutionary and by all accounts he was a fascinating character who suffered and returned from the kinds of crippling failures that would've sent most of us hiding on a beach in the Bahamas (if we had Jobs' money).

I do hope that as a sort of PSA both bios include Jobs' stupid and potentially fatal decision to ignore traditional medicine in favor of the unproven alternative medicine  after he was first diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.

'DUMB AND DUMBER 2' BEGINS PRODUCTION THIS SEPTEMBER

18 years after the 1994 original (which is a classic, in my opinion), the Farrelly Brothers, Jim Carrey, and Jeff Daniels return for part two.

All that's missing is Shia Le-what's-his-name.  

40 YEAR-OLD ACTRESS' SUIT VS. IMDB CAN GO FORWARD

If I understand this correctly, 40-year-old actress Huang Hoang is suing IMDB for posting her age (she's 40), an act that the 40-year-old claims cost her acting roles. But the 40 year-old is not suing those who didn't hire her because she's 40.

Well, how does the 40-year-old know her age (she's 40) cost her acting roles? Did someone confess to not hiring the 40-year-old after discovering her age (she's 40) on IMDB? And if so, why isn't the 40-year-old suing the person who refuses to hire 40-year-olds?

40.

TOTAL 'TOTAL RECALL' TRAILER

Maybe I'll watch the original again tonight, but it's probably only been  a year or two since I last saw it and nothing about the story or special affects felt in the least bit dated. In fact, there are still a number of scenes that still blow me away.  What keeps the film fresh isn't even the special effects--it's director Paul Verhoeven's brilliant direction and imagination.

Of course, there's also Schwarzenegger and his two sexy, bad ass back-ups, Sharon Stone and Rachel Ticotin. I just don't need to see Jessica Biel and Kate Beckinsdale try to recreate and up the ante on the original fight scene between those two characters--which is iconic, perfect, and still a blast to watch. 

INDIEWIRE RECOMMENDS SIX 'CHRISTIAN' DOCS FOR EASTER

More proof that the entertainment media is loaded with assholes.

You think these assholes would recommend "United 93" for Ramadan?

Bigoted assholes.

WATCH THE RED BAND TRAILER FOR SETH MACFARLANE'S 'TED'

GREAT cast and a very, very funny trailer. This is MacFarlane's feature directing debut and he plays the CGI'd teddy.

Casting Wahlberg is genius. The actor always comes off as a character with a heart of gold, which takes the edge of all the dirty words. Casting Mila Kunis in anything is genius because she's a rare kind of leading lady these days -- the kind we all have a crush on.

I busted out laughing at least three times during that trailer, something I haven't done through any feature-length comedy in years not named "The Hangover."

DEMI LOVATO SLAMS TV AND MOVIE INDUSTRY

Who's Demi Lovato?

Anyway, she's blaming Hollywood for her bulimia and something called "self harm." More proof that everyone's a victim. Pretty soon I'm going to sue people who claim they’re being victimized for making me pissed off at their incessant whining. Who's the victim now, crybaby?

By the way, the greatest commentary on bulimia comes from George Carlin.

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QUOTE OF THE DAY

For those who aren’t predisposed to love Sorkin’s work, here’s the attraction in "The Newsroom": Jeff Daniels, playing a big-time, buttoned-up news anchor who finally lets his real personality fly, and then has to deal with the career fallout that results. There are a few potential red flags in this trailer: Sorkin’s near-trademark treatment of women; the possibility that the main figure is a political mouthpiece in search of a character; and a reliance once more on Sorkin’s classic “one man fighting the good fight” approach.

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LAST NIGHT'S SCREENING

Vanilla Sky (2001) -- Though widely seen as a financial and critical failure, I've always found director Cameron Crowe's look at David Ames' (Tom Cruise) dream gone haywire fascinating and meaningful. Leonard Maltin gave the film two stars and asks, "What's the point?" I think the point is one of letting go of your regrets so you can move on with your life -- your real life, not the fantasy you've built up around yourself with daddy's money or while in suspended animation.

The  main players, Cruise, Penelope Cruz, Cameron Diaz, Kurt Russell, and Jason Lee are all outstanding and Crowe does an impressive job of making sense of the complicated themes and storylines. His use of music -- a Crowe trademark -- was never better, either.

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COMING SOON TO HOME VIDEO

HBO is thrilled to announce the June 5 DVD release of Curb Your Enthusiasm: The Complete Eighth Season and the June 12 Blu-ray and DVD release of Entourage: The Complete Eighth Season. Coming just in time for Father's Day!  The latest installment of 'Curb Your Enthusiasm', which finds Larry back in his native New York, was one of the series' most acclaimed seasons yet.' Entourage' closes out its eight-season run with a stellar finale that fans will love.

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SCOTTDS' EPIC LINKTACULAR

WAYS TO BRING BACK LIAM NEESON IN "DARK KNIGHT RISES"

ON THE RISE 2012: 10 ACTRESSES POISED FOR THE BIG TIME

SAG-AFTRA: HOW MUCH WILL PERFORMERS BENEFIT FROM MERGER?

FOUR NEW CHARACTER POSTERS FOR PIXAR'S "BRAVE"

SONY'S "MEN IN BLACK 3" DEBUTS FIRST TV SPOT

"A STAR IS BORN REMAKE" IS REALLY ABOUT KURT COBAIN … IF HE HAD LIVED

ALEC BALDWIN ENGAGED

"ANCHORMAN 2": WHAT TOOK SO LONG, AND WILL IT BE ANY GOOD?

NETFLIX FIDDLING WITH THE WAY THEY DO DVD SUBSCRIPTIONS

VAN DER BEEK OPEN TO 'DAWSON'S CREEK' REUNION

BETTY RETURNS TO 'MAD MEN' IN A REALLY BIG WAY

CHARLIE SHEEN SAYS MARTIN SHEEN WILL PLAY HIS DAD ON 'ANGER MANAGEMENT'

MTV2 TO REFRESH ICONIC GAME SHOW 'HOLLYWOOD SQUARES' FOR NEW AUDIENCE AS 'HIP HOP SQUARES'

"THE WOMAN IN BLACK" SEQUEL, "ANGELS OF DEATH" GETS GREEN LIGHT

PLATINUM DUNES TAKING OVER "HALLOWEEN" FRANCHISE

‘GAME OF THRONES’ SEASON 2 PREMIERE REVIEW

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CLASSIC PICK FOR TUESDAY, APRIL 3

TCM:

9:45 AM EST: Fugitive Kind, The (1960) -- A drifter ignites passions among the women of a Mississippi town. Dir: Sidney Lumet Cast:  Marlon Brando, Anna Magnani, Joanne Woodward.  BW-121 mins, TV-14, CC, Letterbox Format.

Not a great movie, the pacing is off and some of the dialogue is over the top, but an interesting and very well-acted one. From the pen of Tennessee Williams, you know you can expect plenty of atmosphere, scorching drama, and complicated relationships; that's all there, but the sum doesn't equal the parts.

Still, in wide screen and if you’re in the mood, the performances and the feel make up for a lot.

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Please send comments, suggestions and tips to jnolte@breitbart.com or Twitter @NolteNC.


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