The Get Ben Carson Express has left the station and has now reached maximum velocity.
The left, fearful of a successful black Republican utterly unconcerned with their priorities and immune to typical accusations of either incompetence (Herman Cain) or callousness (Clarence Thomas), has set its sights on Ben Carson. First, they sought to deem him a racist by dint of his comments about opposing a Muslim in the White House; now, they’re trying to label him nasty by dint of his recent comments about what he would do in case of a mass shooting.
For those who missed it, here were the comments that set tongues a-wagging: “Not only would I probably not cooperate [with a shooter], I would not just stand there and let him shoot me, I would say, ‘Hey guys, everybody attack him. He may shoot me, but he can’t get us all.’”
For these comments, MSNBC’s Steve Benen labeled the neurosurgeon “ridiculous” and his comments “shameful” and “callous.” When Hillary Clinton compares her opponents to Iran and terrorist groups, however, no biggie. German Lopez of Vox.com called the comments “ridiculous” and ripped Carson for not calling for gun control. No word on Lopez’s take on Vice President Joe Biden, who once suggested that victims of break-ins fire a shotgun through a door. Chris Matthews of MSNBC called the comments “pathetic.” He had nothing to say, however, about Biden’s comments this week suggesting that Republicans were “beating” Hispanics.
But the coup-de-grace—the obligatory “X DESTROYS Ben Carson” headlines you knew were coming—came courtesy of Daily Show Obama hack Trevor Noah. The host has a charming accent, which is new, but aside from that, he’s just Jon Stewart without the talent.
Noah led off with a few cuts of Carson out of context, Daily Show-style, then quipped, “For people who like Donald Trump, but hate his charm and charisma. Ben Carson’s like the drug-free cocaine for people who don’t want to get high but just like snorting white powder.”
He then continued by playing Carson’s comments. He responded that Carson would be unable to rally people against a mass shooter. “I think he’s overestimating how inspiring his presence might be,” said Noah, before breaking out a rather incompetent Carson impression, then fake-falling asleep.
Chastising victims of a shooting for what you assume was their cowardice is what most normal candidates would consider a gaffe. But I will admit Ben Carson does practice what he preaches, because even though the media kept taking shots at him, he kept charging into those interviews… What do you really expect the victims to do? I don’t understand this. This guy would make the worst hostage negotiator ever. “All right sir, I need you to stay calm and put your gun down. Everyone else rush him, rush him now, rush him! How many people are dead? Well, at least it wasn’t everyone.”
Ben Carson wasn’t asked what he would do as a hostage negotiator; he was asked what he would do if he were in a mass shooting situation. But never mind: the non-humor must take precedence. Noah then commented on Ben Carson’s stated preference for arming trained teachers. “Who are you and how do you think this is an education policy?” Noah shouted in faux rage, second-rate Stewart style. “Kindergarten teachers can barely handle a room full of five-year-olds, and now you want them to be Navy SEALs?”
That’s sort of the point: they aren’t Navy SEALs. But they are the only adults standing between a room full of five-year-olds and armed gunmen in certain situations. It would be preferable for them to be armed, given that armed people don’t need to be Navy SEALs to be effective defenders of the innocent.
Finally, Noah concluded by critiquing Carson’s comments on Facebook that he “never saw a body with bullet holes that was more devastating than taking the right to arm ourselves away.” Noah then said that perspective must have made him an unpopular surgeon, and joked via bad impersonation that Carson must have lectured other surgeons on the Second Amendment when confronted with shooting victims. More unfunny tripe—and inaccurate, given Carson’s highly successful career.
Rushing a gunman? It seems crazy… It’s weird that Ben Carson would think a zombie strategy would be the way to go. Unless… wait a second. Slow, languid pace. Dead eyes. Loves brains. Oh my God, this explains everything, Ben Carson is a zombie!
Noah’s insipid take on Ben Carson’s comments actually demonstrates that Carson was right when he said he wanted people to think seriously about what to do in a mass shooter scenario. Noah implies that the best solution was to do nothing and wait for the police to arrive. The victims tried that, and no one can blame them for it—no one truly knows how they would react in a horrible situation like an attempted mass shooting. But if Noah thinks Carson’s main sin here was urging people to take down mass shooters together, he should meet the heroes of Flight 93, or the military men who stopped a terror attack on a French train weeks ago, or, for that matter, Army veteran Chris Mintz, who did charge the shooter at Umpqua Community College.
But it’s easier and more fun to play short clips, make funny faces, and get the trained seals of the Comedy Central audience to laugh at a black Republican candidate. After all, taking him seriously might make him a legitimate threat to a racist media that paints all black conservatives as stupid and uncaring.
Ben Shapiro is Senior Editor-At-Large of Breitbart News, Editor-in-Chief of DailyWire.com, and the New York Times bestselling author, most recently, of the book, The People vs. Barack Obama: The Criminal Case Against The Obama Administration (Threshold Editions, June 10, 2014). Follow Ben Shapiro on Twitter @benshapiro.